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I really like this. I never thought about it this way before and am glad you wrote this. I can't think of a single habitual drug user who is an emotionally mature adult.

I'm going to save this and say something similar in the future when I have kids.

> Recreational drugs make you immature which will prevent you from going very far in life.

Put a "may" before "make" and a replace "will" with "may", and you have a truthful statement. However, as it stands, it's simply false. Some of us "well adjusted, functioning adults" just use drugs safely and responsibly, because it can make life just a bit more interesting.

Ahh, so if you take away the recreational drug, you remove the part of you that has the ability to find life more interesting? Turns out it was the drug the whole time.

Cannabis is just a substance, if I drink kombucha and eat broccoli while at a party it’s still going to be a “waste of time”. If I get high and go for an 8 mile hike and meditate at the top of a hill it’s going to be a great experience and really feel like an important and memorable use of my time.

Granted alcohol and weed hinder self discipline but don’t blame the substances for your actions. Have you ever done a long run or bike ride and had a beer or two at the end? It is pure joy!

I don't really enjoy exercise at all, at least when I'm sober. Get stoned, use an app to tell me where I'm walking, and wind up at a picturesque spot with music in my ears, though? Or go on a scenic route to a grocery store that is a bit further? These are wonderful things.

My point exactly. Imagine if we actually developed the discipline to not only exercise but to also enjoy it. Think of how competent and emotionally strong we would feel. We could have all the wonderful things we crave and more. Or we can take a shortcut and learn nothing.

This is not my experience at all.

I am more motivated to eat healthier, exercise, and so on when I smoke regularly. I spent most of my 20's sober and the opposite in my 30's and overall, my experience in my 30's was much better. I remember about as much either way - at least in the long term. I also learned a second language while mostly stoned.

Overall, I'm much more motivated.

And I'll state that overall, my life is full of wasted time. I don't have children nor much responsibility, really, and I'm over 40. I'm happy, though, and that isn't just the beer talking.

Edit: I can go either with or without and have taken semi-regular breaks from time to time. I'm mostly at weekends now, but that's mostly to save money rather than life stuff.

Keep in mind different amounts of THC and CBD lead to different effect, and also different individuals (which gives both of your stories credibility, but also devalues them).

I've had multiple psychosis's due to cannabis as I am sensitive to it (possibly related to autism). Therefore, what I will say to my kid (same genepool) is be very careful with alcohol, cannabis, and other drugs. Please, don't.

I too am autistic and had an experience similar to yours, although I'm not sure if the effect on productivity was nearly as much, but still definitely there and it was a form of escapism.

Still, I had plenty of time to reflect and mature while not really getting very high due to very high tolerance, although I also had anxiety problems almost like psychosis. Still managed to get out, sort of interview although probably much worse than sober, and barely work on some code. Eh, been a few weeks now and I still barely code. Only did what was required for school after burning out, before becoming addicted.

Almost got CHS after dabbing plenty of CBD (which can also cause CHS, although rare) as well as hash oil. Thankfully I only puked until my stomach was empty, didn't last long and wasn't painful, but I had most of the pre-CHS symptoms. Sometimes I think I could just do a tiny amount as a reward here and there... that it wasn't that hard to quit... maybe I'm fooling myself.

Maybe find some prescription drugs that would give you some benefits you desire? They are more regulated and if you find a doctor you like you won’t be going at it alone. I wish you the best.

Do you want a family? It’s not too late. Kids these days would do well to have a conscientious person like you as a parent. Also seeing a child learn is underrated as one of the greatest joys in life.

No. And I never have. I would have been sterilised when I was 20, but they don't really like to sterilise young, childless women. Or sometimes not childless women. Luckily, my spouse is.

The only real thing I've kept on the table is foster children or adopting an older child. I did keep an open mind about dating men with children back when I was dating.

This is well written. Reading this, I can think of other pleasure-based escapes in life that follow the same pattern. Thanks for sharing this!

It's basically a warning against escapist entertainment of any form.

Add alcohol, gaming addiction, lack off a social support group, and underlying undiagnosed mental health disorders to the list of things that hold you hostage from entering balanced adulthood.

Wish I was more self aware or had family to help support me in my younger years in seeking help. It's hard not to beat yourself up in hindsight when things seem so crystal clear now when you have traded all your vices for positive routines. In my case it took falling in love with the right person who had their shit together personally and professionally to pull me from the grips of substance abuse hell and my self destructive risk taking and addictive personality.

Mediation and mindfulness was key in my recovery as a dependable tool to shut my brain impulsivity down and regain control over the negative neural pathways I've reinforced for years abusing substances. Don't knock it until you try it and see it through until you can start to think clearly without craving your vices and giving into them. Push back hard and you'll be rewarded with clarity and control over your life to set up positive routines. Good luck.

> Cannabis, like any recreational drug, steals the most precious resource we have: our time.

Everything 'steals time'... watching TV, reading books, listening to music, working a job, etc.

> Life is the best teacher and recreational drugs are how you forfeit that precious, amazing, education.

Not at all. It really depends on which drugs, how you use them, etc.

> You don't have to go far to see this in action. Think of someone who is a habitual drug user and ask yourself 'are they emotionally mature?'. They aren't. They are taking an escape. Recreational drugs are antithetical to emotional growth.

I've met plenty of people who regularly use recreational drugs and who seemed wise, calm and content.

> I wasted 20 years of my life 'partying' even on a casual basis.

Cannabis is not really a party drug.

There are vast differences between various 'recreational drugs'. It's how you use them that matters.

Yes, everything 'steals time,' but the biggest time stealers are those things which chemically alter your brain, such as alcohol, cannabis or other drugs. They alter the organs of perception in ways that reading a book or walking a dog do not.

Of course this is the fun of them. But also the downside.

Depends how you define 'biggest time stealers' - tv and video games are huge time stealers for many people. And the fact that drugs have a chemical effect on the brain does not mean they are necessarily worse than, say, watching some braindead tv show while stuffing your face with fast food, or sitting in a classroom for hours listening to a monotone voice regurgitate some dull bullshit you don't care about. Many people have had beneficial experiences with drugs, for example Steve Jobs with LSD.

Have worked with very successful people who smoke cannabis daily. Had no idea until they told me after we were no longer working together. Moderation in all things.

It frustrates me that the tech scene seems to accept such behaviours as smoking weed quite easily. Note the numerous replies to your comment clamouring to it's defence!

I've not known a single long-term user of cannabis to be a happy, healthy adult. Quite the opposite. I think the dangers of cannabis are quite understated and the current trend toward mass-legislation concerns me. It should be noted that I live in England, where we are renown for having stronger strains... This perhaps affects my outlook.

On mobile and don't have time for a substantive reply, but in my experience this comment is misleading. Rec drugs can be a waste of time, depending on how used and particularly when abused, but when used to supplement meditation, I find the experience much more informative than plain meditation.