Just like I have heard about muslim or black stereotypes a lot.
I've not met any of them.
Sure, I saw them online.
Youtubes and "influencers" on instagrams are a terrible, terrible way to assess a population. Take any topic, soon the algo recommendation will make you cringe.
But IRL ?
A good third of the people close to me are veggies/vegans, me included. I've never seen anybody trying to convert anyone, preach, signal value or guilt trip others. We participate in BBQ, find workarounds and make sure everybody is happy when we invite people at diner.
In the mix I have 2 nurses, a person still paying her student loan, a young couple with a new born and an old person earning minimum wage: they do have "real time / money / convenience constraints".
And we talk regularly about "what [we] are actually eating instead of not eating meat". Recommending products and places, reading product compositions, and adjusting diets according to the new studies we came across.
Now I understand that "the caricature is the stuff of comedy". Vegans are a good topic for laughing. I mean, we do weird stuff, it is indeed funny. Sometime I look at my day and think how much crap my teenage self would have given me if he saw me doing that.
But I've yet to meet the vindictive ignorant proselyte vegans you are describing. I'm sure they exist. There are assholes everywhere, but I don't think eating meat or not conditions it. Statistically, there are smug aggressive idiots, and again, statistically, some of them must be vegan. Correlation. Not causality.