What’s better than AirPods? And don’t suggest those rubber things that make weird sounds when I move. Apple earbuds are the only ones I know of that I can tolerate.
You can set an iOS volume limit of no more than 50% on your phone to get a head start at protecting your hearing, but most people will find this unacceptable in the short-term due to perceived “quietness”.
Active noise canceling is a valid option, but only for either headphones over the ears or earbuds that are molded to fit your ear canal, at which point you likely won’t need ANC assuming that it stills works at all after the molds are attached!
Where does one get those and how much does it cost?
Examples:
https://custom.ultimateears.com/products/earphones
The Etymotics are $150 for the custom ear molds, and the price of the headphones which range from $60 to a few $hundred.
Though according to the map on their website the nearest place to me that does the molds is a 5 hour drive away. I guess you could probably get most audiologists to do it for you anyway?
The weird sound doesn't come from the earbud per say, it comes from the cables brushing against your clothes. Try flat cables it removes most of it. Or use earbuds that run the cables behind your ears / down your back.
The only other earbuds I've tried that have such a good seal are models with memory-foam type surrounds you compress before you insert, but they're a bit of work to put in.