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That is an excellent way to put it, I'm going to steal that if you don't mind.

I don't mind in the slightest. Use any way you please.

Now that truly qualifies as a concise ELI5. Well done. :-)

I still don't get this:

Here is a mini usb socket showing the metal latch that pushes into the plug: https://image.dhgate.com/albu_198781941_00/1.0x0.jpg

Here is the other side of the micro usb plug, showing the two metal latches that push into the socket: https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/OesAAOSwxu5ZF07R/s-l300.jpg

And like someone else said, that ain't a micro usb socket in your image.

That micro usb photo is actually a rare mini usb.