I'm not going to defend the industry or "fine dining" in general, and I think what you are asking for is fine.
However, you seem to have a real misconception about the industry ("money-grubbing", etc.). Margins in the restaurant business outside of fast-food are generally really low, and in the actual fine dining segment, even worse (3% would not be unusual there. Go ahead, try running a business successfully at that sort of rate). You are right, they are competing on "experience" but that is because it is what most people seem to respond to - and it is very expensive to deliver that experience. Besides, if not experience - what - convenience? That's where fast-food comes in.
To me personally the middle of the market, particularly the non fast-food chains are the worst trade-off, though I understand why some people love them. I'd much rather play $35 for an entree that was amazing and I have no idea how to make, than $18 for one I could have done a better job of at home for $5... but I'm a good cook and a lot of people aren't or don't have the time.
There are a lot of things not to like about the way it works (many entrees are a loss, margin made up on drinks/desert, servers ludicrously underpaid which pushes their reliance on tips, back of house just ludicrously underpaid, etc.).
I totally get why you might want to avoid the entire thing (and also why others wouldn't) and wish there was more available in the segment you prefer. It's worth remembering though, that to a first approximation nobody is getting rich doing this - most places struggle at best. There are also a ton of people in the industry that really believe (rightly or wrongly) in food and its ability to provide you with experiences you can't easily (or at all) replicate other ways.