Maybe I met some lucky few, but if my impression of Chinese tech working culture is accurate, it's less insane than popularly reported.
I'd rather work in a place with "work-life balance" (whatever the hell that is these days, 8-6?) but such places are disappearing all over the planet. Even in Europe, work-life balance can be goddamn horrible in tech, especially if you work in a startup. Unpaid overtime is common, in a recent interview at a startup of 70 employees, I was told "our official working hours are 9am-6pm but... well, we're a startup, so you know... hint hint nudge nudge".
If what places like Blind are saying is true (that pay in the east is rising to SV-like levels), China and Asian countries with "long working hours" may be viable places to work in the future, since long hours are already a norm in America and becoming the new European standard too.
But I'm making a solid $20k less than I could make elsewhere at my current role. To me though, it's worth it for a working environment where I wake up with a smile at the thought of driving in, rather than waking up with a sick pit of dread in my gut every day.
Some people would work more or much more (they ended up being "nudged" into management, the poor souls, they regretted it dearly), but as a software engineer the market is so much in your favour that you can always go somewhere else.
So instead of spending time with your loved ones and living life, you sleep under a desk just to clock in your 12 hours at the office. Sorry, it doesn't seem any less insane.
Sounds to me that you simply disagree whether having a great lunch and a relaxed working atmosphere is a valuable part of "living life". I suspect that my priorities are more like yours than the average Chinese, but I disagree that you can call them insane for a chilled out work ethic and a foodie culture. It's different, and indeed family gets almost no time and IMO that sucks balls, but it's not the nasty Nazi work regime people make it out to be.