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Comment by the_trapper | Hacker News Reader

> The study addressed this. There are sexist gender roles at play even among single parents, potentially. (To wit, you didn’t lament the rise of “single fatherhood.”)

Isn't that mostly caused by a sexist judiciary. I know that as a man in America in the event of a divorce it is very unlikely that I would get majority custody of my children. From what I've seen it takes a lot for a woman to lose custody if she wants it.

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When I last looked it up, the US data indicated that 91% of custody cases are decided without recourse to the family court system. Of the 9% that go to family court system, 5% are decided after a custody evaluation, and the remaining 4% go to trial. Only 11% of custody cases go to mediation.

It appears that the majority of custody decisions are made by the parents themselves, without recourse to the court, or even to an external mediator. If the judiciary is causing a disparity in custody outcomes, it must be indirectly.

>the US data indicated that 91% of custody cases are decided without recourse to the family court system

The men know that if it does go to trial, it will cost a lot of money and they will probably still lose the kids. There's no point in playing a rigged game.

The custody gap is largely caused by different desires about custody. This is still an issue, but it is the same issue as the wage gap due to different career choices. When men and women fight for custody equally, they tend to get joint custody.

I agree that there is an interesting and potentially informative symmetry between the custody gap and the wage gap. They both describe situations that different groups find deeply unfair, but can be ascribed in large part to "different choices". It might be fruitful to take a more holistic view to understand why the "individual choice" explanation is so unsatisfying to many.

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