Comment by startup_spouse | Hacker News Reader

Comment by startup_spouse | Hacker News Reader

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Yes, some cases are severe. But not all. Which is which is why I, personally, don't think the whole lot should be referred to as "mentally challenged". But that's just my opinion.

I'm an Aspie and don't consider my social deficiencies to be a form of being mentally challenged. I just see my brain as being wired differently than others. I excel at some things my husband is terrible at. He excels at other things I'm terrible at. It doesn't make sense to arbitrarily assign me with the mentally challenged label in that context. In protest, I reject the label :) If we met, you probably wouldn't even know I was an Aspie. I've been told I don't "look like" someone with autism. I don't know what that means, but I'm pretty sure it has to do with stereotyping and labels.

I also say "autistic". I don't care if Jenny McCarthy thinks it sounds like I'm calling myself cancer. Even if she is hot ;)

I'm not saying you're guilty of this, but for many of us (Aspies, Auties) it feels like other people label us and we're not allowed to even engage in a discussion about our own label.

The way you asked the question, I assumed you simply didn't know. :-)

I have heard Jenny McCarthy referred to on autism email lists. But I am not actually familiar with whatever her position is. Actually, I have no idea who she is either, other than someone controversial in the autism community.

To quote Madonna: "I hate labels. They are too limiting." But, as I often add in such discussions, we still need some means to talk about and think about such things, and that generally means labeling them.

Mea culpa. I should have been more clear about that :)

Jenny McCarthy was on MTV back in the day. Also in Playboy. Her son is on the spectrum and she believes it was caused by vaccinations. She doesn't like when people refer to people with autism as "autistic" because she thinks it's the equivalent of calling someone with cancer "cancerous". I respect her passion for helping her son, but I disagree with her. It's a fine balance: parents of small children with autism want to fight for their children's rights and protect them... but sometimes it's the parents themselves who are placing these kids in a tight box that's very limiting. Try to avoid that with your kids (yeah, easy peasy, right?).

Labels are indeed a necessary evil in order to talk about anything, really. In an ideal world, I'd like it to be a label that was mutually agreed upon, not forced on me. But, I think my vote should count for a bit more ;)

Please feel free to contact me if there's anything I can shed light on regarding your kids and ASD :)

Please feel free to contact me if there's anything I can shed light on regarding your kids and ASD :)

Thank you for your kind offer. My "kids" are 20 and 23 and are doing quite well. I've given plenty of advice myself over the years to other folks with kids like mine. :-)

Oh that makes me immensely happy to read! It's always a good feeling when other 20-somethings with ASD are doing well :)

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