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Comment by goldenkey | Hacker News Reader

But good parenting is all about setting limits and never actually being there or allowing kids to exercise self control. What if they find out that Nick Berg was a fearless reporter who was beheaded and manage to form opinions about the world without traveling? What if they watch pornography? I am afraid my kids might actually have to learn about the good AND the bad. Good parents tell their kids that bad stuff is bad...they don't actually let them find out for themselves... I am the son of a robot and I turned out just fine. Bleep bop booop beep. I am limited to sarcastic comments because my dad programmed me to be an asshole. Sorry.

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The solution is not an iPad feature. It’s you deciding to be a good parent.

So, as a good parent, how do you personally teach your kids self control?

As a parent myself, screen-based devices are a class all to themselves. While earlier generations were worried about kids overconsuming things like radio, comic books, television, arcade videogames, etc... devices like the iPad are way more addicting. Perhaps exponentially so.

Talk to any parent and you'll hear stories about how they put their kids to bed and discovered, later on, that the kid woke back up and stayed up until 4am watching videos and playing games.

One way to fix that is to remove the device. But we're teaching self-control and trust, right? So what do you do?

It's a process. I've found my daughter asleep with her iPad in her hands before, it's something that happens and there have to be consequences and rules. All devices go in our bedroom at bed time. If there is work to do, it takes priority as you can always go back to that game or video and continue later. No walking around watching screens.

But self control is just a skill kids need to learn by itself, if they have it as a general ability then they can apply it to screens too. Our kids have to do self-study time on top of homework, they do piano and flute, we take them horse riding and skating. They just joined the local Air Cadet squadron and just did a weekend camping. Spend time with them, do things together, encourage a variety of activities, talk about issues and build close, trusting relationships. I don't think intrusive surveillance has a place in that recipe.

My above comment is in support of that opinion.

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