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Comment by megaman22 | Hacker News Reader

My father always told me that his 30s were the best years of his life. He was married to a good woman, he had two children, he was in the prime of life, with friends, family, athletic excellence, and a career that he loved. His 20s were a wasteland of disappointment, in comparison.

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At nearly 29, with my own wasteland of twenty-something years in the rearview, I can only be optimistic about the future

As you should be; I think this kind of pondering also did not yet adjust for the new life of the elderly; my mother of 70 is healthier and more active than my granparents were in their 50s. And I see that all around me. Not only are you not even at 1/3rd of your life; you will reach close to 100% healthy and active (assuming western country and access to healthcare which is a lot to assume, but this is HN) so you should be optimistic and just do things you want while not staring at your age. Thinking about getting old and lost opportunities makes you old fast.

Reading all these replies as a fellow-29 year old with a shit decade of loneliness, mistakes, and career in the crapper gives me hope.

I'm hitting 30 next month. I'm going to continue on my journey of learning, working remotely, traveling, and hopefully meeting a woman who loves me.

You're only turning 30? You've got plenty of time, don't sweat it. The reality is that 30 isn't old. 40 isn't old, either. 60? When I was a kid, a 60 year old looked like an 80 year old does today.

You don't need someone to complete you, only to complement you.

Thanks for your kind words.

I try to remind myself that I'm still young-ish and have plenty of time but some days it's too rough.

I've seen everyone around me at least go through one loving relationship. I've never had someone who cared for me. When I look back at my relationships, none of them actually cared for me. Hell, even my own mother was abusive and told me she wished I was never born.

I know I don't need someone to complete me but I'm only human.

My 30s are way, way better than my 20s were.

Physically in better shape, married to a friend of 7 years, with a son & good family life, and financially on the way to FI/RE.

My 20s were a hellscape of drugs, loneliness, and debt. Pass!

Of course now the concern is being over the hill already :)

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