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I use 0.0.0.0 which is the defined "invalid" address, so any requests immediately fail.

I tried:-

echo "0.0.0.0 functionalclam.com" >> /etc/hosts

but a subsequent http request for http://functionalclam.com resulted in a page served by the web service listening on localhost.

edit: append to, don't clobber /etc/hosts

Try 127.0.0.254 then.

Or 0.0.0.1, and spare yourself the spurious loopback traffic.

Is 0.0.0.0/8 unused or something?

It's known as "This" Network.

I've found 192.0.2.0 rather useful. It's designated as a test IP range and shouldn't route anywhere useful in normal local networks.