Free will only makes sense in the context of an individual Actor. So we can talk about my free will for example. But for that free will and the choices I make to be mine, they must logically be dependent on my state at that time. If they are not determined by my state, then those choices are in no way mine. Furthermore in order to be free choices, they must not be primarily determined by external influences such as threats or misinformation.

This is not a tautology. It's a necessary requirement if any choices are to be ascribed to an agent that the state of the agent must determine the choice. Why this is in any way controversial really eludes me. So are our choices pre-determined? In the sense we are talking about, yes. Is that a problem philosophically? Sure, but philosophy and the real world have no obligation to be convenient to our expectations or desires.

If you substitute direct choice of a particular next state and instead are only allowed to sample a state space, you still aren't free to choose.

Said another way: flipping a coin cant't make Harvey Dent free.

I would agree, and it's a concise way of putting it. It's easy to criticize the idea of quantum consciousness since no one yet can understand or explain how it would be physically possible, but in a deep way the idea of brains "capturing" / amplifying indeterminacy is extremely attractive.

I read Penrose, etc, but at the end of it could not find any plausible mechanism for humans having free will in the sense of uncaused causation. But I use a modified version of Daniel Dennett's take on it: we CAN choose, we just can't choose what we choose.

Another way of looking at it is to have two different "modes" for thinking of free will: in everyone's daily lives, they use the "traditional" view (how else could we have such things as moral praise or blame?), but when you look at the human brain as a physical system, you use the deterministic/pseudodeterministic view.

However, there is the Strong Free Will Theorem of Conway and Kochen. Essentially, they prove that "if humans have free will, then elementary particles already have their own small share of this valuable commodity", see http://www.ams.org/notices/200902/rtx090200226p.pdf

I'll consider the realistic philosophical consequences of that seriously once they are presented. Your inability to imagine how someone can live with that doesn't provide any support for, and isn't an example of, what those realistic philosophical consequences are.

if there is no free will ... You might as well kill yourself now

So if one doesn't have choice, one should choose to kill oneself? This makes no sense.

Does that steak taste any worse? Does the sunset seem less beautiful? Do your decisions feel less real?

Enjoy the ride! You only have 1 ticket =)

Your past actions and deterministic plumbings of material body constrain the future possibilities but they do not remove the possibility of further choice, in the general case.

Rumi's father -- both father and son were Muslim mystics -- tells an amusing tale of how the question of predeterminism and free-will was settled in their day in his spiritual diary:

   In Khwarazm the great majority [are] Mu'tazilis. No one there ever
   claims to have had a 'vision of God'. The people think of themselves
   as freely acting makers of their own lives. If they meet up with
   Jabriya, one who believes everything is predestined, they cuff him
   about the head and say "It's God's plan that I do this."

   Khwarazm is tough on the predestined people. Their houses are plundered
   and as they walk about in poverty they are clubbed and beaten. Mu'tazilis,
   on the other hand, enjoy the wealth they seize from the Jabriyas, these
   lazy ones who never initiate anything. "That is God's business" they say.

   Theirs, evidently, is to suffer in both worlds.

   "By the One who sets the Earth with rivers pouring through in mist
    below mountains, and two oceans with a strip of land in between" (27.61),
    we move the elements into various shapes without their consent, but
    Human beings, unlike water and trees, have a choice. They are given dignity,
    discernment, and the evolutionary wisdom that can move from death to new
    life, again to die and be restored on another level of Existence.

    You have many choices about the ways you live and work and change and survive.
    Say you fall into an ocean. You may give up and sink, or you may try to
    swim to the shore.

    Salvation is your decision.