The problem seems to be shitty consumer grade hardware (isn't it always), I'd advise upgrading to entry-level business grade gear, it's much more reliable.
Caveat: the configuration UI complex! It's easy to set up a basic configuration. More complex features (vpn, port forwarding, custom firewall) are arcane, in the same way configuring a Cisco router is arcane. But those complex features are available!
Partially....
Yes, consumer grade hardware sucks, but so do consumers. When you see a wifi router in a corner, partially covered in junk (or blocked by household stuff), and it's power brick is sandwiched between 5 devices and is running about 150 degrees, it's not really the hardwares fault.
People that tend to install pro-sumer/commercial equipment tend to plug things into UPS's with proper ventilation and center of the room mount their AP, leading to a far reduced number of incidents.