Comment by sqldba | Hacker News Reader

Comment by sqldba | Hacker News Reader

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I know how you feel. I'm currently technically doing a 37.5 hour week - but it FEELS like a LOT more and it's killing me. A lot of those hours are at odd times and I seem to work more and then take it up in time in lieu but it's entirely recovery time not doing-things-time.

Try explaining to your boss, "We need more staff because although I consistently meet all targets I'm just working TOO hard".

I get gas lighted when I do so. They insinuate I'm doing something wrong and need to take more breaks. Uh yeah but then the work doesn't get done, and day by day it builds up, and everyone is clamouring for it, and then you make it seem like I'm at fault again?

I started keeping an Excel spreadsheet of what I do every day just to see how much time I "waste". It turns out I'm doing 6-20 different things a day. Which is what I've been telling them, the load of constantly switching between so many different demands on attention and doing stuff "which should only take a minute" but can turn into hours spread out over days - all the time goes.

I'm extremely sad every day. I'm definitely depressed. But the pay is good and it pays my mortgage. So I feel very trapped.

And yeah when I get home I do nothing. I used to do stuff and blog but now I'm just too tired. All day every day I'm working and making decisions and stressing out - I have no capability to function outside of hours. I can't even make dinner so my partner does it. I find it hard to decide on even simple things and if anything goes wrong I'll break down into tears.

I hope writing that down helped. Because that is not sustainable. I tell developers that I interview that I don't want them working long hours because it leads to bad code. Go home. I want you to have a life and one you enjoy.

You bring up an often overlooked point. The friction of switching tasks. Some people (non-technical managers especially) don't understand the price. They think "oh, I'll just have them jump on this for 15 minutes, then that for half an hour, then the other until lunch". Wrong. You don't get 15 minutes + half an hour + whatever until lunch. You can take 30% + off the top for the switching. This holds true in non-technical fields as well.

The ideal workday is doing just one or two things. That's where a person gets the most return on effort.

Let the work pile up. Who cares if they insinuate you are doing something wrong. Don't take it personally. Resourcing issues are not something you should be worried about.

I wouldn't worry about them replacing you if they don't understand what you do either.

Take more more breaks. The big picture is that you are hard working person and the amount of work assigned to you will go up until they find your limit. So, slow down to speed that is long term sustainable (e.g. dont slack, just slow enough so you are able to function normally in the evening). If you don't, you will burn out and risk ending up all resentful.

The other part of big picture is that what you need is to learn some negotiation and organizational skills. Them clamouring is negotiation and "making it seem like you are at fault again" is particularly ugly negotiation tactic. Treat them as such. By organization, I mean don't do all "just one minute taks" immediately, put them into tracker, group them more effectively so you dont switch attention constantly. So it is more visible that you are really working all the time and that it piles up. Basically, create system in which it is easier for you to tell "later".

If you can't explain it to your boss, just stop shielding him from the consequences.

When you can't do all the work without getting exhausted, prioritize it, do what you can, let the low value work pile up and people complain. If you can't switch all that fast, don't, or if switching is more valuable than your main work, do prioritize it adequately, what means pushing the attention requiring work down.

And do care about your healthy. Make sure you exercise, get some sun, and control your caffeine intake.

Been in a situation as that, it was ugly. At another job it was also like that, just I pulled in 70-100 hours a week.

They did not care. I spent time thinking about it all these years about it, and also talked to various managers.

If the job is being handled, almost 100% , you won't get any help.

The symptoms sound like burnout. Don't ignore it, because not only is it worsening the quality of your life, but also those around you.

What worked for me was to take a long break, a sabbatical. Think deeply about whether you want to stay or move on when you return.

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