Seriously. I'm a lawyer and I'll take the case. Since no one else wants it, let's do it on a contingency basis. (I am a lawyer, but that was not an actual offer -- just an offer to discuss.)

Another would be to file a claim in small claims court for the max allowed there -- say $10k or whatever and see what happens. You could even represent yourself there after doing a few hours research. Judges will practically let you write your briefs in crayon in some jurisdictions.