> Does anyone else find it kind of odd that Google, a company famous for having no human support at all anywhere

While a number of people push that false meme repeatedly, everything I've heard from people who've used it (or worked on it, but the latter comes with obvious bias) is that the paid human support on GCP is good.

Heck, on the consumer side, I've gotten good (quality and speed) human support on Google Express, too.