I totally agree that HDL tools are astonishingly crap. The market is just so much more specialized, expensive, locked down and closed.
Imagine that you had to use the Intel compiler to get source code compiled for intel processors. You had to use their special headers, you practically had to use their huge 8GB Intel IDE with a million lists and buttons, you had to choose what features were on your intel processor (VT-X? SSE4?). Imagine AMD is the same, but separate. This is all closed source stuff of course. And you have to use it to run on any smartphone/laptop/desktop/server class processor.
Imagine that there's no GCC, no CLANG, no GDB, no Jetbrains, no Eclipse. All the related tools we use wouldn't have much of a reason to exist because just about everyone had to use the huge IDEs for each vendor anyway.
The vendor stuff is huge and inefficient and crap, because features sell, and crap doesn't not sell because there's no meaningful competition.
To be more specific, "crap" means high bloat and low reliability. Crashes, inexplicable errors and failures. Huge amounts of bloat. But you can make a tweak and try again move on, so any sane hardware person just gets used to it, it's not like they can do anything about it.