and imposter syndrome haunts me
You’ll get over it. However, you will forever be cursed with having to keep your wiz-kid credentials up to date as you will never have that degree to help wedge the door open for your next opportunity. Ultimately, if programming is what you do (yes, I know CS is not just about coding) it doesn’t really matter, because the rubber meets the road at some point, and either you can code, or you can’t.