"Software Engineer, Philanthropist, Astronaut, Shark Hunter, Breaker of Chains, Lord Commander of the Snack Bin, Protector of the Repo, and Part-time Cat Dad"
Too much or just right?
And as for 'Protector of the Repo'... basically what you're saying is that you're a repo man?
that seems to be really hot right now
A[nother] minority view getting mainstream (for us) exposure because a few other dinosaurs and hipsters agree.
People need to chill out about this stuff. You don't like OOP? That's great but if it's alright with you, the rest of us are going to carry on with it while you fade into irrelevance.
Of course not everything fits an OOP flow but even Java (the very most verbose OOP IMO) will let you do things linearly or functionally if you want to.
But your comment is purely ad hominem -- to the point of calling the author a dipshit with absolutely no basis -- and does not engage TFA (breaking the first two comment guidelines at https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html).
Snicker. I totally love this and am stealing it from you.
[1] in the sense 'workmanship'
However, I don't think the style of this article is Medium's fault. I find it more and more common that I see a headline and have to skim through the whole article to find out what the point is. I don't know if it is from watching too many TED talks or just poor writing (not mutually exclusive, of course). But then I go read the comments and see tons of people commenting about how they loved the article and how well written it was so maybe it is me that is wrong.
On second though, no. It's the children who are wrong.
But, yeah. I agree with you.