Not all suck, at least not as much as the one in the discussion...
I have used most of those you listed, and some esoteric/legacy/proprietary stuff.
To me, with all its flaws, C#, Java, Scala, Python were the best, with goodness decreasing.
I need to try F# as I feel I'd like it very much. Generally I believe in static type systems with proper generics support catching a lot of bugs up front, and are a pleasure to use, as my personal experience also shows this. You may not have enough experience with Java, or especially with C#, and I suspect that you may even find some of the greatest features there mere annoyances.
After being an experienced C programmer and having same JS experience I can say JS has the much same problems. Bad design decisions initially. Then sticking to the legacy. Lack of expressive power.
Writing correct code in JS or C is a struggle. For some reason both are overrepresented here on HN.
Lack of proper module module system makes JS inferior to most modern languages (C#, Go, Rust,...). (npm solves some of it), and it could be continued for pages, but for a believer/zealot it wouldn't matter.