The article is not entirely clear, but I suspect that the threshold to deploy the Barnacle is lower than for towing. For example, would they really call the tow truck for a car with three unpaid tickets? And if a vehicle is parked blocking a fire lane or an entrance, they'll still have to have it towed, so there's not a one-to-one correspondence between the use cases.
Keeping with apples to apples comparison, the WHO says that more than 8 million a year die from smoking, for a growth of 5 million per year over 22 years, which is not that far below 7 million.
https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/tobacco
I believe the chutes are set not to deploy above 15,000 feet. Also, many of the ejector seat have a seat-man separator motor so you don't land in the seat.
"as a matter of law, animals lack the capacity for culpability" Apparently it was not always thus in European jurisprudence. This podcast episode tells more:
It's the PSAT/NMSQT, which means it's also the National Merit Scholarship Qualifying Test, which is an excellent reason to take it besides increasing your spam burden.
On a serious note, here in the US, to get into med school these days, you have to be pretty much the perfect blend of Albert Einstein and Albert Schweitzer (or Alberta), which doesn't leave lots of time for needlecraft and the like.
Just commenting to point out the use of "legless" to mean extremely drunk. I found this in an online dictionary, but it's new to me. Maybe it's a regional thing.
Remember that cabinet officers and military personnel take an oath to uphold the constitution of the US and to "bear true faith and allegiance to the same" Fealty to country supercedes following orders, always.