iteria

Parents make up a significant enough part of thr population that I can't believe this is true for most people. When you have a kid you have a significant chance of impromptu emergency trip to pick up your kid. It's bad enough that I have seen this restrain people's careers because committing an hour was not viable when you might have to drop everything and get your kid, so they took lesser jobs in order to maintain that flexibility. Speaking as someone who actually lived on public transportation for years in the US, you definitely need a car in the US the moment you have a child. It was what prompted me to get a car. Working with the US's public transportation system is awful when you have to make these kinds of time sensitive trips. Taking ubers to where you need to go is prohibitively expensive (I've done this). Relying on neighbors just puts your kid's wellbeing on the grace of others which is untenable for parents.

Maybe if you live somewhere like New York it's possible, but I can't see it in other US cities. You definitely need a car in the US. If you don't have one as a parent in the US, you wish you had one.

All that would result in is less transparency. People wouldn't put their house openly for sale anyone and you'd just create informal market places. Or worse people would just hang onto properties and not sell them at all, biasing towards turning houses into rentals.

It's good protection for men from female birth control failure, condom failure, and so on. I don't think the intention is that now that men have birth control, women would stop using theirs, but that men could feel secure that they have the same kind of reproductive control that women have.

There's too many applicants for that. You're getting canned responses because a human probably never even saw your resume. The other issue is that there is a small amount of people are _extremely_ unstable. Giving them any kind of feedback encourages them to harrass the company and employees. It's like 1% of applicants, but when you're dealing with this many people it means you are guaranteed to run into someone like this, so it's often policy not to give specific feedback.

A lot of times, it's not even spying on users. It's not wanting to put in the time and effort to determine if you are in compliance or not. So you block all of Europe and you get around to it if you ever have the resources or care. You might have been in compliance the whole time, but why chance it when IP blocking is easy. That's basically every local US newspaper right after the GDPR passed. Hell, I've worked for companies where I literally know we're not tracking users and we're pretty secure, but we block the EU because no one has the time to check if there was something specific we needed to do. My current company had to rarchitect their entire to deployment pipeline specifically for the EU, not because we changed literally anything, but the laywers found that there was about our cloud host provider that the GDPR disallowed because it was hosted on US soil. We have 1 EU client. I assume if they weren't so big we would have dropped their contract.

If that were widely believed, passports wouldn't exist, and trespassing wouldn't be something you could be charged with.

You can say it's a right, but I'm not sure there's any wealthy nation that believes that any random human should be allowed to travel wherever they please without paperwork to prove they belong and/or are safe.

I'm not really a fan of real ID, but I also think that the US should has a national ID and the US has the right to deny free travel to those it didn't invite in anyway.

> if you think they truly meant well, it's hard to resent them.

It's easy to resent someone who means well if what they're trying to do is make you miserable because they can't see how you could be happy. That's my parents. They can't fathom how I can enjoy my life and and have done everything in their power to keep me from living the way I want to live. They are willfully ignoring that I'm not them. They may have good intentions but I had a happy childhood in spite of them, not because of them. If adults in the world didn't take an interest in and see me, I could have been a miserable person. So in that sense, I do resent them. Good intentions don't mean anything when you refuse to acknowledge people as they are instead of who they are.

Feels extremely silly that the government would allow this threat to still stand. Feels like when this happened, it should have sparked an initiative that every child could attend public school if they wanted. I get bending in the moment, but that's a kind of threat that should have no teeth for a nation's government IMO.

You're talking about a bullshit lunch of sandwiches. Most people are talking about breakfast, lunch and dinner where they have to juggle the wants and temperaments of their whole family and then spend more than an hour planning and getting that food. Because part of grocery shopping is inventorying your food stores and considering price and sales and how much money you have. When you're poor, you don't go to one grocery store, you go to multiple. I used to travel with my money to get stuff for the hour and it took hours. She made so little that it was better she spend her time rather than her money. When I was a poor college student I got it.

I'm a middle class white collar worker who makes every single meal my child eats and it sure as fuck doesn't take me one or two hours to feed my kid. I meal prep and I lose my entire day to just making food for the week.

The actual situation. I have just picked up my child from wherever they are and I'm bring them home. I can either spend upwards of an hour cooking or I can stop at a fast food restaurant in the drive through and get food immediately with no effort on my part physical or mental.

Who is waiting while food cooks? When I cook I am attending to the food the entire time. Perhaps if you are a heavy oven user you get time to do other things, but otherwise, no.

And laundry lol. To barely keep up with the laundry, I have to do a load a day and the on the weekend I do several loads. It wasn't like this before I had a kid, but everything grt dirt faster and more often with a child around.

Being a parent who works is _exhausting_. You're always weighing money vs time investment. In many cases it's just easier to buy food you don't have to make or think about then have to do the whole rigamole of planning and buying groceries and then cooking the food yourself. If you're like me and you order a head via an app, you don't even have to wait the few minutes fast food takes. It's right there for you and you carry on your way. I can now spend my mental energy on something else.

I drink bottled water for a couple of reasons:

- I did not plan well and I'm now in a situation where I need water I didn't bring my own bottle. I don't want to be chained to a water fountain if one even exists conveniently near me. - I don't like the taste of the water where I am. Clean water isn't always tasty water. As someone who grew up on aquifer water, I found the chemically water of my college town hard to deal with. At least bottled water was inoffensive. For some brands anyway. - I want easily sharable water. This one became pretty important when I was a parent. It's just easy to keep a bunch of water in my trunk and pass it out to my and other kids on demand. I knew people like this, but it wasn't until I had kids that I got it. Kids will ignore their body needs and aren't always capable of finding sources of water on the even if they were aware.

As always when this comes up, I ask about schools. Every single school system that has tried 4 day school weeks has had poor outcomes across the board. Children do worst academically and they fair worst socially, since that one less day is one less day that at risk children have access to either safety or food in some cases.

We can't ask teachers to work 5 days when the rest of the world doesn't. I'd also be interested in how much of the value some people are pulling from 4 day work weeks is just having a kid-free day to accomplish things. Would the value for care takers (who would make up a significant amount of young people) the same if their children accompanied them?

I don't really have an opinion on the 4 day work week, but I do think it's important to consider impact from all angles. I just never see the question of children come up in this conversation, although we know from covid that anything that impacts how children do anything in a systematic way has huge impact good or bad.

I am so confused by this comment. Accounting software for small businesses is standard. Quick books is so ubiquitous and it's dirt cheap and supposed to be operated by a lay person. There are whole professions here are almost exclusively small businesses. Trucking being a decent call out. I know several moonlighting tech people who spun up single person businesses using a template and carried on that way for years just using very basic accounting software. They do contracts and everything on their own. I have an aunt who has spun up several businesses doing business with the actual federal government and she's never had more than an accountant she has check her receipts for taxes. She has no background in anything and somehow was able to launch these businesses. I have writer friends and artist friends who have LLCs. I've never heard anything like what you're talking about.

I don't know anything about the UK, but it most certainly is not hard to spin up a business in the US.

I guest kinda tired of Californians being the sole yard stick all of the US is measured by. I think it sucks to live like they do too. It sounds very stressful to live on the edge like a lot seem to.

But like my very poor sister can match you. I'm very middle class and can match you as well in anything but part-time work and rent control, but my rent has never been a significant burden for me. I take a week off every quarter on top of the standard set of holidays. I take off just to spend time with my kid at her school and it's fine. I know I'm pretty privileged, but given you brought up wealth like that, you're talking about pretty privileged Americans in California. My health insurance for me and family is $200/mo. It would $70 if it was just me. These kinds of benefits have been super common over my career.

There are a lot of Americans in less cool states who have a pretty decent life setup. It really varies by state. Like I don't even have student loans because there's a series of state granted scholarships in my home state that effectively mean that attending a state college is tuition free for residents, although you gotta figure out books and lodging.

I absolutely love this idea and I will be lobbying for this going forward.

The struggle I have having many white male friends who express their particular struggles that I might even agree with are a problem is that 1) Many of the expressed issues are problems brought about by them that I can't do anything about. Literally. They need to get their own camp to change it 2) where #1 doesn't apply, I find that they're not willing to take part any kind of advocacy work. Even just, you know, speaking plainly that this sucks and I hate it. Why did I have to pull this knowledge of out you. The struggle of other groups is well known even if they are berated for having that struggle. 3) Often times, when #2 doesn't apply they get upset that people don't immediately fix it. And then I get to look like thr asshole who points out that other groups take a decade to accomplish one agenda item. You trying once isn't gonna cut it.

It's not that I'm not sympathetic, but it just feels like my white male friends really disregard the timeline of how these rights other groups fought for came about. That's part of the privilege of the dominant culture used to having their wants tended to in a year or two, not over a generation.

My parents disagree with me about having a job and my own money. Yeah fuck'em. I don't miss them at all

People always bring this up but in my 15 years of working in tech I've never seen anyone fired on the spot unless they really fuck up. Like cause the company serious financial or legal harm kind of fuck up. The tech layoffs get a lot of attention, but that's a tiny, tiny fraction of the US's tech labor pool and full of some of the most privileged employees of an already salary privileged set of workers.

In reality what happens is you get 3 months notice of a firing in the form of PIP. Perhaps if you work at Walmart you can get fired on the spot, but honestly in industries where this is a common occupance, it's also well known that the employees also just don't give any notice at all either. They just stop showing up, maybe won't even give a 1 second of notice.

Personally, I'm happy for at will as someone who has had a shitty. Shitty job that ate at my mental health. I just had to say "today is my last day" and I fucking left and that was that. Got a final pay check and paperwork for continuing my benefits if I wanted them and this was at a random company in a labor hostile state. In some place like California, they would have been required to pay my last paycheck that moment instead of when the never payment day was.

I've seen employees work contacts that mandate notices by punishing you with legally enforced fines and whatnot and I just cannot see the benefit of being forced to give notice. It's just encourages your employer to make your life hell in that period if you're on bad terms and you had a good reason for leaving.

Right to work laws can get bent though. That's active underminement of unions for no benefit at all for an employee.

22 is so many direct reports. If my supervisor had 22 direct reports. I'd just check out mentally because I know I wouldn't get any real face time with them to discuss issues. Skip manager attention? Forget it. With 22 direct reports, you're not there to add your expertise and make the process better, but to be a cog in the machine.

This push for tech abstinence will end much like sex abstinence. Instead of "wait until you're an adult" we should instead be teaching our child good habits. The issue is of course that most adults don't have good habits for children to modle either.

My daughter has had access to a tablet since she was 12 months old. She's 5 currently, but she's not a tablet zombie as I so commonly see reported of toddlers with free access to phones. Just yesterday, my daughter freely, without my intervention, put away her tablet to play with a child who happened into the room we were in. She never touched it again until we were bad into the car and begged me to leave and play with her new friend outside instead of ask for another set of headphones for the friend.

This is the result of my international teaching of my daughter about how we interact with devices. As someone who grew up with the internet in elementary school, I feel extremely confident, I can keep this up even as my preschooler turns into a kid into a teen.

I just think it's a shame that I'm surrounded by parents with intention of teaching her kids about how to responsibly use their devices or they want to deny their kid access at all like somehow their child will magically manifest all the skills they need to deal with infinite stroll once they turn 18.

Except with all those examples you gave, there are almost not parents that would encourage their child to do that. They would be cautioned over years not to do so. With college that's not the case at all. It is purely happenstance that I don't have loans from school. I knew college was expensive, but the extent of the expense, was not clear to me at all surrounded by a family who had never gone to college. I avoided loans because an in state school happen to be good enough for my teenage dreams and my state had a series of grants for poor and intelligent students. It could have gone very differently though and no one would have told me it was a bad idea.

As a kid who had go get up at 5am to catch a bus to school, maybe they might. The issue is not riding the bus, but impeding on sleep. As a teen, I would have preferred to wake up st 6:30 to be to school at 7AM rather than wake up at 5AM to be there at the same time because I'm the first stop. My mom wasn't kind. I did survive, but I also had less sleep which isn't great for a growing mind. I'd drive my kid in the same situation. Hell, I drive my kid now because I don't want a kid who can't write letters yet walking around any real distance without me. Especially in a semi-rural area where we've encountered wildlife and feral pets that weren't dangerous to me, but were dangerous to her.

We can apply this to everything. No one is trying to raise the age of candy and soda purchase to 16. Although we know that having access to these things drastically impacts children's health. Fast food too.

Like it's the literal job of a parent to tell their kids no. Over and over and over again. So instead of parents teaching healthy habits easy with something a child will not be a le to avoid as an adult, we'll just unleash them on them right when failure is high impact because some parents are lazy and we're not willing to have public service campaigns anymore.

Or really want this is is one more step to a de-anon'd internet, where everyone's speech can be controlled.

Except that's new too. When I was a kid, I could travel wherever I wanted without anyone calling the police on me. It was just normal for gangs of elementary schoolers to wander about. I'm a millennial, so it wasn't even that long ago this was a thing.

Videos. Every time I get a video from an iphone user it is trash quality. Other iphone users don't have this problem. It's just me on the android. I cannot seem to get any iphone user to understand linking out from whatever icloud or whatever, so whenever someone sends me a video they took, i basically don't get to see. I'm sure there are more, but this the one that actually makes me mad.

From the iphone side, there has to be something, because my family keeps 2 group chats. One with android users and one without. Someone when using an iphone is annoying when group texting android users.

I'll provide another data point. While I too lost that much weight by eating one meal a day that was just the extra weight I got due to the combo of covid trapped in side and new child. But once I got back to my "normal" 20kg overweight by BMI I fundamentally cannot lose this weight. I eat one meal a day. Except Fridays where I have a take out meal. I don't drink. Because I can't due to medication. I have 2 sodas max a week. Doesn't matter still nearly obese. I have been this way since I got a car. There's something about walking and taking the bus that I can't emulate through going to the gym.

Right now I'm taking the extreme tactic of just not eating foods 3 days out of the week and that's working. Slowly. But no one who eats as healthy as me should have to do this. I show people my meals. I prepare them myself. I don't make fried foods. My meals are not low carb, but it's not like I eat pasta every day. I show professionals my meals. No one can say there's anything wrong with them.

The bizarre part is that at nearly 40 my medical stats are perfect. It makes doctors not bother me too much about my weight. People would kill for the kind of resting heart rate, cholesterol, etc I have at my age. This is just where my body likes to be if I'm not gonna walk 2 or 3 hours a day.

I'm not saying I'm like most people because i definitely have family who say they don't drink they just have a glass of wine or family members who complain that I only keep water in the house while lamenting they only ever seem to gain weight, but for some people weight loss is not so simple. If I have to skip eating all together every other day to lose a pound a week, something is strange.

You're forgetting the people who absolutely were not fine. If those people die in childhood often enough, that eventually gets removed from or significantly reduced in the gene pool, but people have to die first. It's like asthma. Those kids used to just die. Now we have inhalers, so it appears like asthma is on the rise when it's more that less people die from it. It looks like adults who grow up drinking that water are fine, but you're ignoring the toddlers who died from drinking that water.

But there are reasons for municipalities to do that. Namely infrastructure. The city next to mine allowed uncontrolled building of housing and that city is a shitshow right now. The roads are clogged and often gridlocked. They deal with all kinds of failure modes in their utilities due to high usage. No.

My town is being more strategic about it. They allowed businesses to come in first and expanded out the robustness of the local coop's electric grid and only then did they allow appartments and they are doing them in stages to make sure the area can handle it. This is important in an area where not everyone is even hooked up to the city's water supply or has access to city sewage.

There's also less kids and that makes people drive faster. When I was a kid, there would be a dozen or more or us in a gang on bikes anywhere in the city and that was just us. There would be huge gangs of teens wandering. When I was a teen, I used to walk 3 miles to downtown with my friends for mo reason at all. My city hasn't changed except you don't see kids literally everywhere. Even in quiet neighborhoods with parks in the center, I don't see kids ambling about or playing. There's nothing dangerous around, but they still aren't there.

I think this is just the decline of the birth rate. I think about my neighborhood. My kid should be spoiled for kids to play with, but couple only has one kid and the ages are spread from infant to nearly an adult, so it works out in the whole neighborhood theres only a handful of kids she can play with. I see bus stops with just 2 kids there. When I was a lid there were nearly a dozen at just my stop.

I really think because there are less kids, it's just less safe for them because people don't honestly think they'll turn the corner and there well be half a dozen kids playing basketball in the street or something.

They probably forsaw this coming and wanted protection in case of a lawsuit.