343 karma · joined February 18, 2020
Thanks for the advice, I know there's not really a "perfect" solution, I was just curious about how you've approached it in your own life so I appreciate you sharing.
To your last point, I'm feeling much better when not pushing myself so hard to be social but the question I'm grappling with now is somewhat selfish but about how to make sure I have support? E.g. I had a friend who just went through a cancer diagnosis and a lot of us friends and his community rallied for him. It also made me wonder about what happens if I get very sick, or lose my job and don't have a professional network to reach out to or personal/friendship support, or just if my car breaks down at 1am or something, or just being very lonely without real close friends.
How are you reconciling this sort of thing in your own life?
Edit: the subtext I’m speaking of is of submission and domination through implicit or explicit coercion. I’m not speaking of sub/dom with connotations of mutual enjoyment and consent, as can be the case in real or fictional situations of romance in general or even specific kinks like BDSM. I may be called sexist for this but my perception is that women can and do enjoy the latter (as the popularity of books like you linked imply) and greatly dislike the former
Like I said, I can't recommend that series now that I have a more mature perspective. But I can't imagine that a book written by a misogynistic author with explicit themes of female submission to male authority obtained by use or threats of physical and sexual violence would be particularly appealing to women in general, let alone women who have grown up in a culture that has in recent times had much more acknowledgement of such things, e.g. MeToo, more widespread conversations about toxic masculinity, the oppression of women by physical force and the male-dominated hierarchy that projects that force.
If you disagree and think that young women (and enby people) would find such books appealing though, I'm interested to hear why.
I grew up obsessively rereading Redwall, Pendragon, RA Salvatore’s stuff, Ranger’s Apprentice, Enders Game, Tyrant of Jupiter, Maze Runner. Like you said, the me of now can’t recommend things like Tyrant, but still I can’t imagine that would have appealed to any of the girls I knew at that time, let alone the young women of today.
By the same token, although I read Twilight and Hunger Games, I never was obsessed like the girls in my classes were. I can’t imagine that boys today are particularly interested in A Court Of Thorns and Roses and the other spiritual successors of Hunger Games, Divergent, Twilight, etc.
To GP’s point, “guys” is interesting to me; it feels like a U-shape where people who don’t “get it” think it’s non-gendered, as do people who are very tuned in online (streamers, gaming spaces -which lean heavy male anyway -, highly online twitter types, etc) where cultural trends move and spread quickly. Then there’s kind of the middle I see, think HR activist types (acknowledging that HR does not always mean activist and vice versa) - clued in enough to follow the ideological trends, not quite enough to sense the ongoing shifts in real time. To be a bit reductive, I’d sum it up as something like people carrying the cultural context with them of the 2000s, the 2010s, or the 2020s
I also have sympathy as, if this thread gets bigger, I bet you get more of the same reactions you’ve already described. Feels to me like this is less screaming into the void for nobody to hear and more into a hurricane where, for your troubles opening your mouth, it gives you back a metaphorical lungful of water to choke on and a metaphorical cloud of debris to batter you with.
Thanks for trying anyway
Edit:
> Thanks a lot, really. I certainly feel more included now.
Sadly, I believe that to them, this is a feature, not a bug
I'm an embedded guy, the advice above is a reverse of what I've done in the past for clients: I wrote the embedded device firmware and dabbled a little in using .NET to create a portal for the customer to view and manage data from a fleet of devices reporting things like timestamp, battery level, temperature, etc.
Related link: Gwern's "The Melancholy of Subculture Society" https://gwern.net/subculture
> "Perhaps even more alarmingly, U.S. Treasury markets are also experiencing an incredibly aggressive selloff..."
> The largest holders of Treasurys are Japan, China and the U.K.,...
The announcement is not currently reflected on their website (https://pysimplegui.com/).
My EE major started with circuit theory, had labs with Arduinos and advanced to digital logic (embedded software) theory along with labs using professional-grade microcontrollers (TI MSP430, I think). Senior design capstone took us through schematic capture + PCB layout and getting a board fabbed. We did the soldering and populating components on the custom boards ourselves. Granted that was using Mentor Graphics and not Altium, which seems to be industry-standard, but it was still relevant and practical coursework.
I also have a text file where I list various activities that reward points or cost points, which I'm trying to use as motivational scaffolding for being more productive/healthy in my daily activities. I pasted that file into chatgpt and it gave me suggestions for rebalancing various point values and suggestions for other rewards/costs, as well as a structure for bonuses with intent for boosting motivation at certain point thresholds. I found the reasoning for the suggestions to be compelling enough I did actually incorporate a lot of the feedback from chatgpt.
For iOS, I now use Working Copy for git commit/push/pull, and Obsidian to edit text, and I like Obsidian's interface a lot for making quick Markdown edits.
I believe Obsidian has an Android version as well, but I have not used it. I'm not sure if there is an Android version for Working Copy but there may be similar GUI git apps.
(not affiliated, just used and liked it back when I had a public facing blog)
If I can't stay calm and think rapidly under mild social pressure without threat of bodily harm or lost lives, I personally wouldn't feel honest in telling my teammates, "yes, if you or I are in a situation with risk to life or limb, you should trust that I'll handle it appropriately and protect myself and/or you."
> or extract value from them
"Only costing 7 dental practices' worth of capital to effectively run 10 practices" is the idealized vision for what PE can and wants to do.
In practice, what ends up happening is extracting value by financial maneuvers like directing the companies they own to sell off assets, but charging a transaction fee so the PE group gets a cut of the sales. Or by owning a company and being its largest creditor -- getting to discharge liabilities as the owner by declaring bankruptcy but subsequently still maintaining control over the company as its largest creditor. [0] (Ctrl+f for "Sun Capital" in the page).
Disclaimer: I am an employee of a firm that was somewhat recently acquired by private equity.
[0]: https://www.ineteconomics.org/perspectives/blog/private-equi...