The question isn't about each individual's drinking problem. The question is about tech culture's drinking problem. And there's the answer: denial.
I think most companies and employers don't think like that because they simply assume everyone likes to drink which is incredibly closed minded. I've known other people, other than myself, who do not drink or cannot drink (because of unrelated health reasons) feel pressured to drink at work. I'm sure someone will say that one can refuse. That is true. One can indeed refuse, but not without negative consequences. One cannot refuse and still keep one's status and place. The refusal will be questioned, as if the refusal is the unnatural position, not the offer. I'm sure it's even more hellish for addicts who have to work at these places, but at least, they're quite used to unfair social stigma.
Seems to me this thread doesn't show denial at all. Most conclusions that people draw from particular threads are confirmation bias. That's especially true about the largely random initial state of a thread. Typically they soon fill up with comments contradicting the initial impression.
The topic of alcohol has appeared on HN many times, always generates active discussion, and never lacks for critical comments. If anything, anti-alcohol comments tend to dominate slightly.
Since when does tech even have a drinking culture, let alone a drinking problem? All the tech companies I've worked for have had a weekly happy hour where most people have a beer or two, and that's the extent of it. It's nothing like the sports world, where you have guys regularly downing 10 or 15 drinks on the bus or airplane. Or like the entertainment industry, where some of the top people in the field show up to work so shitfaced they can barely even stand up. Or like the mining industry in Siberia, where the nightly entertainment is/was sitting around with a bottle of vodka and some potatoes.
I don't really do "company outings" or hang around though. I'd rather see my girlfriend (who doesn't drink). Maybe the problem is having your friend base being based around "work" instead of around a healthy shared interest, like cycling, a rock climbing gym, soccer, etc.?
Personally, I don't drink that much. I've had maybe 4 beers in the last month.
I resist the idea that not going is "lazy", however. "Lazy" is spending the work day reading Randall Munroe's "What if?" instead of working on the outstanding task list (I'll accept guilt on this one). Lazy should not be considered not attending extracurricular work activities.
> If you are too lazy to go drink one with your peers, then you will suffer less social success and poorer network, but I think you are being intentionally lazy, so you reap what you sow.
You think that someone is lazy because they don't want to drink? This is nuts. Is someone who doesn't share donuts in the morning also lazy? How about someone who doesn't eat pork? Are they lazy?
If this is really your attitude, if you really expect that people should feel obligated to drink, then you have a drinking culture problem.