Your Server is not a Pet

Well, thank you for your technical contribution, but your lead strikes me as an anti-metaphor that should be avoided:

I give names like Starburst and Stork to my cattle and form bonds with them.

Cattle can actually have as much personality as dogs or cats.

You can't just "put down" cattle if they are sick; they are far too expensive for that and I have spent well over $1000 saving one steer. I just finished getting foot surgery for a bull. Branding is mostly resigned to history although I suppose there are people on BLM land somewhere that still do it. "Put down" usually means euthanasia and that cannot be done or the meat is inedible; instead cattle around here are shot in the head with a rifle at point blank range by the butcher.