vaksel,
your statements about getting a bunch of guns, going out in a blaze of glory, etc, clearly indicate you are full of hope and would be justifiably pissed off if external forces pushed you toward suicide. This is in line with your desire to be remembered, your legacy, you want to have consequences.
I think a number of the negative responses toward you are from folks who have known death and have learned to cherish life the more thereby. They are deeply concerned by what may appear to be cavalier comments about killing. Justifiably so.
You're in a forum for hackers. Presumably you find the values of hackers to be admirable. And you seem to have put a lot of effort into pushing back. If I had to guess, you want someone to tell you why you're wrong, but not just tell you, you want them to prove it.
Well, instead, be a good hacker, and figure it out yourself. Go read up on suicide. Why people commit suicide. Here's a good place to start:
http://scholar.google.com/scholar?q=aaron+beck+hopelessness