Quick, Patent It

I second the parent. The typical inventor thinks the description and drawings are important, while they are really secondary to the claims which are what is legally protected. Unfortunately, writing a good set of claims is an art that can only be mastered through a lot of experience and research into what has been effective with the USPTO in addition to what has been upheld in court. While this is not out of reach of the HN audience, your time would be better served by innovating and letting a good IP law firm handle the patent. This will be expensive -- costs are at least $10K, and software patents typically will cost more because prosecution (arguing with the USPTO why your invention is patentable) will be longer. IMHO, the whole process is soul-sucking and why I no longer practice patent law.

However, if you do wish to proceed the best play to start would be with the official Manual of Patent Examining Procedure (MPEP):

http://www.uspto.gov/web/offices/pac/mpep/mpep.htm

I do know that it will have to involve hiring someone, and thank you for validating that, but it would be fantastic if someone could help guide those of us looking to do this.

In light of this article and the fact that we are on the topic of patents, it would be priceless for someone to give us a rundown of what the process really looks like, resources on writing it as best you can to possibly lessen the impact of the cost of hiring someone, and knowing how much is reasonable when hiring someone.

That may be asking for a lot, and that information may be invaluable to the holder in such a competitive market, but that is precisely why those scams (which finally got busted) years ago flourished (you may remember the commercials on t.v. for patenting your idea).

That's the last I will comment on it, but I do thank you for basically saying that no matter how you do it, hiring someone is not an option if you want it to be defensible.

I'm pretty sure someone went to a playground and directly observed "skilled practitioners of the art" independently discovering the methods. I think there might have been some prior art on a few million 8mm film reels in people's attics as well...

It would seem immediately apparent to most 2 handed children. I do find it interesting that the patent missed out on the method of elevating one's ass by pressing outward on both chains. Now that's technology.