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Comment by WalterGR | Hacker News Reader

Very interesting.

Keyword = "crush" = brief description = "this person considers the referenced person to be a crush (i.e. has a crush on the referenced person)"

Keyword = "date" = brief description = "this person considers the referenced person to be a date (i.e. is dating the referenced person)"

I'd argue that considering a person to be "a date" does not imply that one is dating that person.

Doctorow: "In meta-utopia, the lab-coated guardians of epistemology sit down and rationally map out a hierarchy of ideas..." http://www.well.com/~doctorow/metacrap.htm

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I don't get it.. Maybe I'm just being a little slow, but how does the fact that I consider I went out on a date with X not mean that I'm dating X?

In the logical sense it does, however typically the term "dating" connotes a commitment to the relationship that is a a bit deeper than simply going on a single date. I think it's the modern equivalent of "going steady".

I would argue that "dating" means that we go on dates together (present tense being important here). But a lot of people are "dating" before they have a specific conversation about exclusitivity.

That's the difference between the literal meaning of the word and the implied meaning I think.

Example: I offer to meet you at a computer store to help you pick out a good monitor. You, having a crush on me, consider this a 'date', I, not having any romantic feelings for you whatsoever, consider it an act of friendship.

And yes, there are people that think such things constitute a 'date', they usually turn out to be a scary creepy stalker types once you tell them you're not interested.

Miss Manners has a simple protocol: a date must contain food, entertainment, and affection. In the early stages of the relationship, it's mostly entertainment and just the slightest hint of affection. As the relationship progresses, the level of affection increases. When the affection becomes the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances may the food be omitted.

I generally don't consider it as "we're dating" until at least the 3rd or 4th date. The first few dates are tryouts for "dating".

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