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Actually systemd is more like DCOM which is much worse.

The registry is fucking marvellous in comparison.

Nah, the equivalent of DCOM is dbus.

Which is what systemd is built on. At least on windows COM stays in user space but no, fuck it, lets use kdbus on Linux...

Sure, that's what built on, and that's why the equivalence was incorrect. You'd might as well say that systemd = Linux.