I personally prefer the use of fuzzy words and don't see them as scammy, but rather as an indication of someone being honest with me. Remember: Only a sith deals in absolutes (
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgpytjlW5wU) - SCNR :-)
OK. Back to topic: The language is fuzzy, because no one knows the Google algorithm. The best SEOs can do is make predictions and tell you the general steps to make your site rank: Nail your on-site SEO and build links.
There are two good resources for this: http://moz.com/beginners-guide-to-seo
http://moz.com/beginners-guide-to-link-building
As narrowrail said Moz holds a lot of information for SEO marketers with an interest in playing nice with Google.
Then there is the whole topic of "blackhat" SEO - i.e. people who use techniques that Google does not endorse (e.g. private blog/link networks). They know a way to make it to #1 on Goolge right NOW, but are running the risk of being caught by Google and loosing all their rankings. IMHO the best resource for "short-term SEO" is www.viperchill.com.
SEO is an easy-to-learn marketing channel. It is relatively low-cost, but slow on the uptake. If you make your way to #1 for a keyword, you usually stay there for some time. That gives SEO a fantastic ROI - at least in my experience and that of a few other founders.
Regarding your specific questions, this might be helpful: http://www.brombone.com/
Additionally, you should sign up for the Moz community (IIRC that is free) and ask your questions there. A lot of good SEOs hang out there and are willing to help. Also try http://www.reddit.com/r/bigseo - pretty helpful crowd there, too.
Disclaimer: I am the maker of www.linksspy.com, so I am slightly biased towards SEO