The only logical explanation I can come to is... more RAM won't make a meaningful impact on the experience. More ram is the cure-all on a desktop but that's not apples-to-apples.
Well, not this time =p
Except when it would, as in, the case we are discussing right now.
I was under the impression that RAM had only negligible differences in consumption per-module, and capacity per-module has increased dramatically.
Besides, the main source of power usage is the screen.
Does a DRAM refresh for a denser chip draw substantially more power, or something?
(Legitimate question, I am obviously not an expert and I'd just love to learn more about this)
People who are curious about system internals. Probably some of the people who read a site like HN. Even my dad likes to understand where these limitations originate and he's not a 'computer person' (though he is an engineer in another field).
Of course it matters. If you understand why, you can take steps to mitigate it or work around it. In this particular case, one workaround is to close unused programs and browser tabs every now and then to clear up memory so that the active tabs don't go through a forced-refresh. This is what I do on my 4S, and I haven't had to deal with the problem the OP describes in a long time despite being a "heavy" user.
Android, on the other hand, doesn't force this. All apps assume they can do whatever they want in the background, without being shut down. This means, on my low-memory Android, that opening an intense browsing session followed by Google Maps kills all of my background chat apps, making me unavailable. This is far more unacceptable in my opinion then having to wait for an app to reload.
(I would agree that iOS is too aggressive when it comes to memory management, though)
Edit: Formatting
I think you're underestimating one's capacity to accept a tradeoff. Once a person learns that RAM is constantly consuming power as it's being refreshed – and that a device with more RAM is going to have less standby time – they might appreciate the decision to try to do more with less.
The reason is to give you better battery life and fewer issues caused by limited available memory.