I remember reading a blog post[1] by a person whose tech/startup related business had them travelling in/out of the US on a semi-regular basis. They were stopped and questioned by immigration officials during one such trip. Here's a quote from the post:

I further explained that my current work visa application had been complicated due to a filing mistake and that I had been waiting on a decision. This fell on deaf ears. They searched my backpack, found my hackathon badge which drew incredible suspicion and asked, “What’s a hackathon? Are you a hacker?” I slowly explained that I’m a social entrepreneur promoting global change through the concept of ‘hackathons’ where attendees work together and find solutions to community issues within a tight time constraint. They were dismissive and didn’t seem to want to hear an explanation.

I don't disagree with you that the conversation relating to the dominant definition of the word "hacker" and related terms is over with the more narrow mainstream definition winning out. I do think however, that the disparate meanings of the word and related terms can lead to some surprisingly unfortunate misunderstandings. Maybe one solution is for people like us to start using a different word for what we typically mean when we use "hacker" in the more general sense. Though I guess if that hasn't happened by now, it's probably not going to.

1. https://medium.com/@aurora/are-we-welcome-entrepreneurs-or-u...

It seems that more and more people understand that the word has multiple meanings and connotations. Look at the widespread use of terms like "lifehacking" and "IKEA hacking".

Like how "gay" can mean "stupid" in some contexts, and fighting it is like sweeping back the tide, right?