Julia Ferraioli's account of casual sexism in tech

Possibly. Sounds like it may have been an attempt at "negging" I've read about in seduction/red-pill forums. In which case the guy is doubly a douche. Means he doubled down on his sexism in an attempt to pick up a lady. Instead of, you know, treating her like a human being.

Whatever it was, it should be considered completely socially unacceptable, and people like him should be ostracized by the other people in their peer group.

I'll dust off my account to reply here.

The point isn't to find an explanation for it. This sort of behavior drives people out of technology (or pick your industry). I wouldn't dream of going up to someone, with or without cause, insulting them and questioning their capabilities based on some irrelevant detail -- in my case, gender. Let's communicate that this sort of behavior is unacceptable, and let's do it by calling it out. People won't learn unless we tell them.

The insidious aspect of this idiocy is that any attempt to educate by myself and my colleague is undermined by the individual's bias, so no matter what we say, it won't be taken seriously or given any weight. This is why good allies are invaluable.

Also, I take issue with the idea that hitting on someone is the primary reason to "[talk] to females." Hey, I'm a person with interests and expertise. How about talking to me about that?