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Comment by professorTuring | Hacker News Reader

I stopped giving money to "beggars" long ago. I usually help them by buying them what they need.

I go with them to whichever close market or restaurant and buy them what they really need, I don't usually put a money limit but rarely goes over 20 bucks with a nice food basket.

Part of these process is also listening to their stories, sometimes you can even hire them for some tasks and I usually tell them to help others in the same way if they have the oportunity (or to teach their children this lesson).

Of course they could sell these items later but I really feel good about this and I don't think they do that.

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I have heard a lot of people say that they do this, but I have never seen someone actually do it, nor have I heard a second-hand report of someone doing it.

I'm not saying that you're not telling the truth, but I am saying that most people who say that they give food actually give nothing (neither money nor food), but tell their friends and random message boards that they give food, because it avoids looking miserly (if you give nothing) or naive (if you give money).

I don't really care what you think. Also, like most of the people that help, I do that to help people, not to brag about helping.

Like I say, I'm not accusing you personally of anything!

And I agree with you completely - most people that help, do that because they think that helping people is the right thing to do.

I'm saying that there are a whole other (much larger) class of people who actually don't help at all, but say that they do (to their friends, on HN etc) because they don't want to be thought of as miserly.

Just look at the comments on this thread. At the moment, by far the largest number are saying that they don't give money, but that they buy food or other goods instead. If that were true, I would expect to have seen someone give a homeless person food at least once in my life, or offer to take them somewhere they could buy food, or just stop to talk to them. As it is, I've seen zero people give food, maybe a few hundred people give money, and hundreds of thousands do nothing.

Well, the problem here is that maybe you simply didn't notice. I have never noticed anyone buying goods for another people but I have seen a lot of people buying together, how can I be sure one of them were being helped by the other one?

When we are at a supermarket we don't usually notice anything beside our own grocery list...

I've done it a couple of times. One guy asked for deodorant and food, so I walked with him to 7-11 to get deodorant, then across the street to McDonalds. And like the GP, you can talk with them along the way. Sometimes they don't want food. One homeless lady in my neighborhood (who recently passed away) refused the coffee we bought for her one cold morning. My wife had a few conversations with her and discovered that she like writing in notebooks--she had lots of them. So we bought her a few new notebooks and pencils. She didn't want food or help from anyone.

There was one time, someone asked me for small change in order to buy water. I offered him to buy the water without giving him the money. He turned away and kept walking. This is why I tend not to give money (and feel really bad about it).

Better to help those who don't deserve it than to neglect those who do.

Yeps, the repetition over this is what led me not to give money but instead helping them in this other way.

Also, trust your instincts.

I've been asked at gas stations for a few bucks to buy gas. That one always seems to be a scam.

I tend to give money to older people and people who are offering a service. There was a guy who hung out at a grocery store with a bottle of window cleaner and rags, and he'd clean your car windows for whatever you gave him.

If they're young, look fairly healthy, or look like druggies, I don't give. If they demand a certain amount (I've had someone demand $20 from me!) I definitely don't give.

I don't see beggars close up all that often. Here they're usually standing at an intersection with a sign. If you're on foot in the City, there's a lot of panhandlers, and I think you'd be begging yourself pretty quickly if you gave everyone a few bucks.

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