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Yeah, why not use a language like bash that we use everyday for config management instead of reinventing the wheel in YAML.

This is pretty much why I love fucking shell scripts. http://fuckingshellscripts.org/

Because modern configuration management tools like Ansible (or Puppet, or Salt, or whatever) allow you to do more things more easily.

Also, because Bash is a particularly horrible language. I have a lot of experience writing bash scripts, and I hate bash.