I like the term 'coder'. It essentializes what I do, it does not diminish it. In my view making software is a craft, closer akin to woodworking (or painting!) than engineering.

In my non-screen tiem I try to make beautiful things out of wood. The "correct" term in that community for what I strive to be is "cabinetmaker". I am not offended when people call me a carpenter. Their understanding of "carpenter" is a bridge from their mindspace to mind.