Even if you're not for gay marriage yourself, why would you want to stop that ability someone else for whom that's important? There are very few things in life that are truly truly significant for someone, and for many family is one of them. Wanting to put a wedge in that for someone else IS a hateful action.
Instead, the state would offer civil unions to any two consenting people.
Now if Mr. RightWing doesn't like your gay marriage, he doesn't have to recognize it, but the state will still issue your "union" without discrimination.
The main issue I took with Prop 8 wasn't necessarily that it was discriminatory (although I don't like that either) but that it was taking away rights from a group of people by encoding it into the state's constitution...which is generally a document which codifies people's rights, not lack thereof.
That baffles me. Do you not have any friends with non-citizen partners? Do you live in a really rural place or something? Are you mostly friends with straight people? I'm trying to understand how you haven't come across couples like that. Those partners can't currently come to the U.S. and work, unlike their straight counterparts. And depending on where they are from, in many cases, there is no country in the world both partners can live and work.
That seems righteously messed up to me. And maybe you think we should be able to sponsor immigrants without getting married (as I do) but that law isn't on the table and same-sex marriage is. Given that, I don't know why you would prefer same-sex marriage to be illegal.
His actions that have an effect indistinguishable from hating them. It turns out this is a thing he actually did.