I'm far from an expert. In a lot of cases, what you say seems true. The Nationalization angle is BS for sure. But, there are some differences that
are important. Foreign depositors did not get bailed out, not by Iceland. That in itself is a big deal. That's a clearer definition at least of what a bailout is. The banks went bust and deposits were lost. Then foreign central banks returned some despots to
their own citizens. Iceland paid out its own citizens and some depositors were not guaranteed by anyone.
It's clear for instance that UK public money went to UK depositors. The UK is entitled (though maybe unwise) to do this and it sets up a framework for explicit guarantees. In Ireland's case, god knows who really got bailed out. The EU loaned Ireland money to loan to their banks to pay back depositors who were other banks..etc. There was pressure from Germany as both the source of much of the financing and the destination of much of it (Irish banks owed money to German banks). No one went bankrupt, for a normal definition of the term.
It amounts (in my limited understanding) to a few important difference that leave the system far more robust. (1) there is some transparency. It is knowable who is getting bailed out and where the money is coming from. (2) Some long tail risk is put onto depositors, especially foreign/large depositors so it can be priced in. A Hayekian sort of systemic risk reduction. (3) It appears to have reduced the flow of money from poorer future people to current rich people. (4) It clearly defines depositor bailouts as depositor bailouts. Money goes from the public purse to Ms Gunnarsdotter's. In other bailouts (Ireland) the public was driven to fear that banks would collapse and their savings wiped out unless some unknown quantity of money was put into an unknown funnel from where it would flow (among other places) back into their deposit accounts.
IMO we need to come to a long term setup that is simple enough for a first year economics student to understand and first year finance student to price. A guarantee is fine, if we can set it to an affordable level (say, deposits up to €25k) payable directly from the government to qualifying depositors with potential recovery by a bankruptcy court.