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I might be lying, but I think stripe recently enabled ACH support?

I believe harrisreynolds was talking about ACH debits: https://www.balancedpayments.com/ach-debits

Correct. Stripe can do ACH payouts (credits) but cannot pull money from a bank account for a payment (ACH debit).

You can also not fund stripe to do ACH payments. So if you have your own merchant account with much lower rates, you cannot use Stripe to pay out.

You can with Balanced, which is awesome (in theory).