> if the standard workflow doesn't include incredibly lightweight branches, I'll stick with a version control system that does.
There is no real standard workflow. There are tools in place to build whatever you want. This is old, but remarkably still relevant:
http://stevelosh.com/blog/2009/08/a-guide-to-branching-in-me...
If you want git-like branches, Mercurial bookmarks are close, but not quite the same. They have some intentional differences, which make sense and do not impede you, but will not make sense if you absolutely want them to behave like git branches.
> "commit --amend", "rebase -i", and "add -p"?
hg commit --amend, hg histedit, hg record (but hg crecord is much nicer).
They're built-in, but you have to flip them on the last two with a config switch.