'Ask me to telnet into your CV or solve an algorithm that prints your CV...'
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If everyone had the ability to read minds and know how a given employer wants to see their resume/CV, then a 'standard format' wouldn't be necessary. But because the powers of long-range telepathy have evaded us so far, we end up agreeing as a society that certain formats are acceptable. It's not that we personally like them, but it's 'safe'. It's considered normal and there is kind of an unspoken agreement between everyone that a .doc or .docx file is acceptable.
If you ask 99% of employers to telnet into your CV, they are probably going to tell you to kindly fuck off, and so you don't.
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'They’re going to complain about overtime'
The idea that you don't want to hire people who are motivated strictly by a paycheck is fine, but this attitude right here breeds the shitty culture in software development we have today, where 60, 70, 80+ work weeks are considered normal and 'if you don't like it, leave'. It's poisonous to an entire industry. People have lives -- I like to volunteer at my local zoo and write music in my free time. If I had a job that just expected dozens of overtime hours every week because 'reasons', then I'm not taking it.
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In the real world, people do want jobs. People do want jobs they love, and they are willing to give up a lot for jobs they love, and you might be providing them with one, but you need to come down to earth and realize that this isn't the only job they will ever apply for and expecting to be super impressed by the way they apply for the job is unrealistic, unfair, and I dare say, 'out of touch'. These people also have lives outside of work. Hobbies, family, friends and such take time and if you are hiring people that are willing to give up all of that in the name of work, I'd be really concerned for them.