Actually I had exactly the same feeling when I started using Emacs: the very first thread on some newsgroup I remember reading was about moving lines up and down, like in sublime(?) with M-S-<up>/<down>. The poor guy who dared to ask was immediately told that this is "not the emacs way", that there are many better ways to do this and so on. Ofc, halfway through the thread I found working code which implemented this feature, but the impression it made was not very good.
But Emacs architecture and it's consequences, like extensibility and customizability, and giant heaps of free, working code are enough for me to just ignore people like this. Or rather to ignore most Emacs related discussions. It's good that Emacs makes it easy to just stay away from other people: all the docs, and the source, are there in the editor itself, so if you don't mind spending a bit of time you can figure anything on your own. Which is what I do and what I like doing.
But I certainly do understand your feelings in this matter and think they are justified.
[0] I'm going to go ahead and assume that you aren't a smug, self-absorbed sociopath.
Maybe you tried at the wrong moment and happened to get the attention of the rare jerk or two, or maybe you were doing something that managed to annoy people (you sometimes see people asking questions in very overbearing and demanding manner ... "Give me the answer now!!" etc).
Indeed, I'd say #emacs is actually a lot better than typical tech channels / mailing lists etc, and the stereotypical techy "attitude" is largely absent there. If anything the biggest problem with it is not attitude, it's that 95% of the discussion on #emacs is not about Emacs (it's kinda ... laid back), and your question might get lost in the noise...
For the function that solves your problem saves the day but knowing how to find any when needed solves a lifetime of problems. Pointers help to put you on the right track so you're not discouraged.
Basically, they shut me down. The thing I was asking was contrary to the whole philosophy of Emacs. I had, they assured me, no right to ask it. I was an idiot for having the problem that I was seeking to solve. And nobody, they told me, had ever had the problem ever in all of history.
Were they right? Well, no, not even slightly. They were horribly, evilly wrong. But even if they had been right, their response was wrong. Their argument was "if you have this problem that can be fixed by a change to Emacs, change yourself". This, in the most extensible editor on the planet. It was like being told that my car's tendency to pull sharply to the left when passing another car was normal and expected and I should take care not to pass other cars.
I didn't just develop my contempt for the community all in one go. I had to WORK at it!
Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a lifetime. And if you really hate the man, get RMS to design him a fishing rod.
And pointers can be given at the same time; there's no reason why an answer can't include both, as is most usually practical. It's fun to play the role of delphic oracle, but only as a joke that all concerned are in on, as it's terribly frustrating to be on the receiving end of it.
I checked my logs. It was one guy that was abusive. Everyone else was friendly and helpful.
So you doom the whole Emacs community because of one user on #emacs the one time you were there?
I think you have just described the normal IRC experience for any software project in existence. IRC just tend to breed cliques and inside jokes, and the most common form of reply I have ever gotten while looking for help is "check the source code". Never mind that its a few thousands line of low level C, magic numbers and possible some assembler instructions.
I found the python, ruby and perl channels very nice when I was learning the languages a decade ago or so, and by my occasional lurking they still seem to be.
Recently I was on #elm on freenode and it also was a nice place.
Cliques and inside jokes obviously are part of what a community _is_ but that doesn't necessarily translate to smugness and lack of empathy.
I have used the python django IRC channel when developing some sites, and "check the source" has been the most common answer when I run into walls. Usefully, the questions I make receives some basic "see if the documentation say something" which I had of course already done, and then after a few hours of silence, someone says "check the source". This was a 3-4 years ago so maybe it has been improved?
It is true that I don't go to an IRC channel except when documentation and extensive testing has failed to produce an answer. Maybe the smugness and lack of empathy is more a product of asking questions that are not easily answered?
I would say you had bad luck and met an ass (which could happen as anyone can go to #emacs and rant around)