Just as people say they want to reward creativity but subconsciously don't, you'll find that putting yourself out there as a master-of-all-trades will leave you with few callbacks.

It is the nature of business that if they want to hire somebody, it's for a narrowly-defined scope (solving any and all problems is something a CEO or more likely a founder does, not really anybody else). Imagine doing a carpentry job and finding inside your box of 2000 nails a "rare and special" piece of metal that isn't a nail, but can do the job of a nail, screw, brad, rivet, and/or wi-fi hotspot. You're not going to consider it a bonus, even though maybe you should.

Find something that you can do well, that's in demand, that pays well, and position yourself to focus on that on your resume. If not just one but a few of your passions meet these characteristics, put together a few monolithic resumes and send them to the appropriate places. They don't have to completely eliminate your ancillary experiences, but they should mention them in a downplayed manner. Remember, the resume is not the job; merely your way of getting it.