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Comment by kirse | Hacker News Reader

I noticed this effect very early on as a kid, where I was often hacking away at some new project or trying to undermine some system.

Some of my ideas were pretty exciting, so usually I'd be bursting to pass on my excitement to someone else - usually my parents. (As any entrepreneur can confirm, coming up with a great new idea is very rewarding) However, I never failed to feel like I lost some intrinsic level of motivation whenever I explained to someone else what I was working on.

It felt like holding a secret only you knew and then letting it out spoiled it. After awhile I learned to contain my enthusiasm and direct it toward making a functioning product before telling anyone... this probably explains why I tend to be much more independent when it comes to my startup ideas...

Working in secrecy makes you feel like you're about to pounce a revolutionary new idea upon the world and take it by storm.

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Of course, on the flip side ... having people continually asking about your progress is actually pretty motivating (even if for the wrong reason)!

Once I tell people, however, I find myself waiting for those other people's questions about my progress. And if I don't get them, I do lose motivation although the reasons for them not asking me could be any (e.g. they didn't really understand or they're too busy with themselves).

So once I put it out there, I tend to constantly look for external validation even though I might not want to. It's not my own anymore.

I have the same problem, although (as I've mentioned before) I'm a writer, which I believe requires the same kind of creativity and ability to pull out unique ideas for solving problems.

Once I've announced a project, it seems to lose some of its energy and when people don't ask to see more, it makes me question my work. I stalled on one project after showing it to my wife, she didn't ask about it for a long time (which due to college, work, friends and immigration papers, she hasn't had the time to read anything). However, the self-doubt creeps in and now I'm stuck deciding between an entire rewrite of the old project to correct the problem, or to switch completely to my 'on the side' project that has occupied me for a week (compared to a few months) and has produced about half as much in much less time.

I also realised that the people I've listened to have been the wrong people, despite them being well intentioned. When I used to work as a reviewer, my editor praised my personal voice as akin to Terry Pratchett, but when I used it in actual stories I was told it had too much personal voice in it. Stupidly I listened to the other people and not my instincts.

So now I'm back to pointing my own compass, which is where I enjoy being and where my motivation stays up. Ironically it involves hiding the work from my wife, although I usually don't write when she's home anyway, which is definitely going to get me kicked (the question is where) if I end up with a finished 80,000 word novel I neglected to tell her about.

"Working in secrecy makes you feel like you're about to pounce a revolutionary new idea upon the world and take it by storm."

I wonder if explaining your idea to someone means finding inexact words that end up making your plans seem less majestic or even plausible.

You hear yourself describe what you're doing, and start thinking, hmm, maybe this isn't such a great idea after all ...

I wish I could upvote you 5 more times.

But now that you said it there is no need anymore.

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