Dear HN: Help Me Get To Startup School

I'm a broke college student(University of Michigan) who got into Startup School and I really want to go. I will build your company or individual landing page, put in 40 hours of marketing(social media, emails, whatever else), bizdev (creating decks or comprehensive excel tools), write multiple blog posts, basically anything that will make me $400(~roundtrip from DTW to SFO) or 3.5 Bitcoins so I can go to startup school. I have 5 days to respond to the invite and would love any and all help I can get. Thanks in advance!

Email is aashayk@umich.edu and other contact info is available on my HN profile.

If you are feeling extra generous, here is my Bitcoin address: 1DWDmXbRmcjooFDomwbhKm9Kz2aHiEjJXh