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Comment by a3voices | Hacker News Reader

It would actually have been a better plan though. What's interesting to me is that she doesn't seem to consider her weight to be the core problem. Her quality of life will remain lower because of her reluctance to lose it. The mean comments could have been a wake up call to her, like, "Hey, maybe I really do need to focus on losing weight."

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But maybe she doesn't really need to focus on losing weight? Maybe as someone who actually knows something about her own life, she is in a position to decide that there is other things with a higher return of investment that she can focus on, especially given her medical situation (which we are almost entirely ignorant of)?

Meeting arbitrary beauty standards to be perfectly attractive to the worst of internet commenters isn't and shouldn't be everybody's first and only priority.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Preventable_causes_of_deat...

It seems pretty important to me.

Will you quit riding in a car?

Every person gets to trade risks and benefits at their own discretion. To me, the years I've saved traveling are well worth the risk of riding in an automobile. I hope you won't try to convert me to however you feel about it.

But you're assuming that she is not going to all reasonable lengths to address the issue, which is completely unfounded! The article even mentions how she has been adressing it, even though it's none of our business and completely besides the point, just to preempt your cries "just lose weight then, HEH". Sequeing into of "well she's still overweight so clearly she isn't trying hard enough" shows that you're just either trying to be provocative or don't understand how being overweight works.

Seems that you're not her, so you're in no position to decide what is and isn't important in her life.

I suppose I shouldn't be, but I am a bit surprised by how easily people seem to think they know exactly how other people have gone wrong in their lives. And how to insult them into fixing things.

Are there really that many people around who have so completely solved their own lives that they know, after a single article, exactly what is wrong and what will fix total strangers?

And, these wise insightful people seem to choose harsh judgement and even shaming as tools to fix others. That seems odd as well, I wouldn't have thought such enlightened people would go the judgemental shaming route.

Stop digging. Who said her weight was a "core problem"? Seems to be just people like, erm, you.

Ahhh, the shining example of bully thinking! This is how all bullies I have ever had the honor of meeting have been thinking. They will find some small (maybe just perceived) failing of a person and act like that justifies all the bullying. It’s so disgusting I want to puke.

So, you aren't being a judgemental jerk, you are trying to help her. By shaming her into doing what you, in your great insight into other peoples lives, have figured out would be best for her.

You are so kind.

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