Having Uncomfortable Conversations About Money
blog.quoteroller.com
blog.quoteroller.com
"Back yourself into a coner - Nothing makes asking for more money easier than not having an alternative."
Maybe that makes the conversation more urgent and steels your nerves. I could see how there'd be a psychological benefit there. But the best way to build leverage in a negotiation is to have a strong hand before starting the negotiation. This concept is known in behavioral sciences and business theory as BATNA ("best alternative to a negotiated agreement"). In layman's terms, it's your Plans B, C, D, etc. The stronger your backup options, the better your position in the discussion.
This correlates with the market-based theory discussed in the article ("If you can find someone to pay you X, you're worth X"). You increase your chances of getting X if you can get Backup Y as close to X as possible.
Glassdoor is extremely helpful for leveling a lot of the information asymmetries that push a money discussion in the employer's or client's favor. But Glassdoor isn't the same as leverage. Just because a typical Role X makes $Y doesn't mean you are entitled to that...unless you convince the market that you should be, i.e., by getting someone to give you that much (or more).
At the end of the day, whatever works best for someone works best for him. I would just caution against intentionally backing oneself into a corner. Sometimes we do our best with our backs against the wall, but that doesn't mean we should seek to put ourselves in that position.
I have negotiation skills in spades. But I tend to be a doormat. Being under the gun has been extremely uncomfortable but is getting results in ways that simply studying the subject intellectually was not. Getting over some things has been terribly difficult for me.
My situation is complicated and a comment or two on HN won't convey it. If we had more time to talk, we might find we agree more than it seems.
Peace.
When I was working as a consultant I literally doubled my rates in the space of two years by simply not caring if I lost any gigs because of it and that was staring with a hourly rate of 3 figures.
At the time I was following the advice I had picked up from other consultants - never leave money on the table. I had enough money in the bank to retire indefinitely, but instead of simply walking away my aim was take as big a cut of the pile as I could get it.
Five years later I was sick as hell of the work, so I did walk away but the opportunities in that niche were rapidly fading by that point. There was probably less than a year's worth of work left anyway.
I think there's an advantage to this though.
> I’ve done plenty of business with friends. In fact, the
> majority of my business has been with friends or
> acquaintances. Some of those friends even stopped using
> me when I raised rates over the years and they’re still
> my friends. I’m having drinks with one of them tonight,
> in fact.