"The official site of Zach Galifianakis. Zach is so happy that you found his site. Though he doesn't have the ablility to feel any shred of emotion for another human being he is content that his money was well spent in a website. Do not attempt to make contact, physical or otherwise, with Zach Galifianakis or any of his associates. Failure to follow such requests could result in loneliness and an overall realization that you and someone of his magnitude can never be friends. Zach Galifianakis does accept money. No sexual favors will be handed out for such monkeys received. Zach Galifianakis does not like children unless under the influence of something strong at a high dose. Zach Galifiankis spells his name as such to confuse the living fuck out of you, all your friends, your friends friends and the Pope. Do not question Zach Galifianakis."