Stop Forcing Your Kids To Learn Musical Instruments

I kind of disagree with this.

A lot of the problem of 'should I have my kid learn an instrument' stems from the lack of quantitative data surrounding the practice. Sure, kids that play instruments tend to do better in math or whatever, but is that because they are playing an instrument, or because they are reaping other, more silent factors that are associated with being of a class of citizen that can afford to play an instrument.

Questions like that are hard to answer.

My personal philosophy is terribly flawed, and based on my own personal experience, but I think it's important to open that particular door for a child. Whether or not they stick with it is up to them, but then the question is, 'at what point can I let my kid make up their own mind.'

For me, this was 11 years. For the first 11 years I studied piano, I wanted to quit. I really liked it the first 3 or so years, then I hated it around year 6, then I warmed up to it again around year 9 and finally, in what could best be described as a revelation, I seemingly overnight saw the value in what I as doing and saw the value in those around me who were truly great, both in the past and the present. That was the moment that I had made a concrete, non-emotional decision.

I would have regretted it if I hadn't been forced to stick with it all through my childhood. I'm really thankful my parents made me stick it out, and for me, it was totally worth it.

For better or worse, every kid is different. What ended up being a blessing for me might be a decade of torture for someone who doesn't 'get' music. It might be 'a waste' as it does require some concentrated mental and physical application to ascend out of 'I can play Coldplay' into 'I can play Chopin'. It is a really demanding practice to become a classical musician.

Today, I don't really have an answer, or even a recommendation. I really think everyone should get the opportunity, but after that, it's a terribly difficult problem with no good answer.

I disagree in my case.

My parents introduced me and my sister to piano at a young age. We both hated it. My parents gave up forcing me to play after a year whereas they continuously pushed my sister to play piano.

Now I can't play piano while my sister enjoys playing pop, jazz, classical pieces on piano.

I'd like to offer a counterpoint. I took classical piano lessons, and I didn't like it at the time, but now I'm glad I did. I still play from time to time. I think my appreciation for music in general is much greater because of it.

You could make the same argument for sports- most children who interact in sports will not do so professionally. There are physical/mental benefits to sports which at the end of the day 'doesn't matter'.

I feel that the purpose of making your child learn X at a young age is to simply expose your child the possibilities of life. There are so many overlapping ideas or life skills between different disciplines that any experience is good experience. Of course, like the answer to many things in life, moderation is the key.

Forcing is not the right word. The arc of learning music is like any other. http://www.avc.com/a_vc/2012/03/the-startup-curve.html

There is initial novelty, then it wears off, and you hit the through of sorrow. Usually in the sixth year. It's important at this stage to recognize it for what it is. If you can guide your child to cross it, then it is the perfect analogy for other endeavors they may chose to tackle.

> As for the enduring value of music lessons, I propose an even simpler test. Go on Facebook and ask your friends to chime in if, when they were children, they took five years or more of a classical instrument. [How many are still playing?]

That definitely hits home with me. I took classical piano for years as a child. Hours and hours of practicing, lessons and recitals. I haven't played piano since grade 5 or 6 I think.

I can't get this to open. I will note there is a known correlation between teaching classical music and math ability. Also, not everything worthwhile in life is about a paycheck.

Stop telling parents how to parent.