Desert Bus: The Worst Video Game | Hacker News Reader

Desert Bus: The Worst Video Game

newyorker.com

177 pointsdanso65 comments

This is awesome. I have lived this video game. I just finished driving a 1987 ex-military Land Rover 110 from Galveston, TX to Seattle, WA. My top speed is around 55 mph (pushing it) but most of the time I averaged between 40 and 45. I took the backroads, mostly dirt roads in the desert, whenever I could.

Pics:

Galveston to Colorado Springs: http://www.flickr.com/photos/defender90/sets/721576332973927...

Colorado Springs to Salt Lake: http://www.flickr.com/photos/defender90/sets/721576335549344...

Salt Lake to Seattle: http://www.flickr.com/photos/defender90/sets/721576341355761...

Nice trip. On that note, somebody really ought to remake Desert Bus with Google Maps' Street View (including the route from Tucson, Arizona to Las Vegas, Nevada from the original game).

If it could deal with daytime vs nighttime that would be amazing.

"Drive Simulator"

This looks like an AMAZING trip. I am jealous as hell...if nothing else for the Rogue Whiskey.

That whiskey surprised me. I'd never heard of it when my buddy brought it along. I wasn't expecting much but it was excellent.

Agreed. I was skeptical (it's their first whiskey, IIRC), but I was pleasantly surprised.

Back roads sound more pleasant than the same length trek on a highway.

Great pictures!

It's a significantly better game than the festering, cancerous legion of predatory money extracting non-games that have turned the iOS and Android app stores into cesspits of addiction and credit card fraud.

Your amazingly succinct description of all that is wrong with today's mobile app stores is bordering on poetry. Nicely put.

Okay, I get that you don't like freemium, but those games are still more fun than Desert Bus.

To be fair to Desert Bus, it's bad on purpose.

It's not fair to lump all App-Store freemium games together. Nor do I appreciate your characterization of enjoying a videogame as "addiction". Some are money-grabbing cesspits, but others are well-designed freemium games. Clash of Clans comes to mind as an exceptionally well-designed freemium game. I've spent money on it yes, but for the amount of enjoyment I've received, and the camaraderie (someone in my clan bought me Reddit gold), Supercell has earned their money.

So, you are saying what exactly? That there are good games in the App Store? That's not a proposition anybody disputes.

I'm actually saying that the "predatory money extracting non-games" aren't necessarily that. I get a strong whiff of "get off my lawn" vibes from the people who hate that business model for gaming. I'd prefer a more nuanced discussion that didn't dismiss all such games out-of-hand. For a forum that loves (LOVES) freemium startup models, it sure hates on the freemium model applied to video games.

It's not quite that clear-cut even for CoC though: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5825158

I'm not sure what you mean. The post you linked to is pure flame-bait that furthers little meaningful discussion. There is room in the App Store for both "time vs. money"-type freemium games and everyone-pays-up-front games. Sure, some people will burn out on freemium games, but I myself have burned out (a bit) on "pay up front" games (I've spent hundreds, if not thousands on Steam on games I have never played...) At least with freemium games I only have to open my wallet after I've decided I really like it.

Why in the hell have you spent "hundreds, if not thousands" of dollars on games you have never played?

Steam Sales make people do crazy things...

"And for only 10 credits you can make the bus go faster"

This reminds me of the Minecraft youtube let's play series "Far Lands Or Bust", where the protagonist, KurtJMac, is walking from the center of the world to reach the outer regions, the so-called "Far Lands", a fabled (well, not if you cheat and teleport there) place where floating point errors become so aggravating that the minecraft world generation mechanics no longer make sense.

He's been "walking" for a couple years now for Child's Play too and has raised more than $100,000 in donations.

http://farlandsorbust.com/

Granted, the generated landscapes in minecraft are far more entertaining than Desert Bus :)

Reminds me of me and my friends co-oping through this game. Our goal was just to go the farthest possible. Spawn points didn't exist at that time and dying would mean end of the game.

Always thought Desert Bus was a brilliant piece of art.

Here's a couple of people beating the initial trip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gl9D6kCv2eY

Here's where you can play it ported to Java: http://desertbus-game.org/

I'm sorry, but no. A game shouldn't qualify as worst ever if it's intentionally bad. It has to be a game where the publisher was intending for it to be fun. I present to you, IMO, the worst game ever created - Big Rigs Over the Road Racing:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rikTiT2OwqQ

I take it you have never tried some of the Xbox Live Arcade/Indie "titles." Big Rigs looks like Final Fantasy compared to half of the arcade/indie titles.

Those don't inspire the same kind of awe as when the train wreck is professionally made.

Reminds me of The Onion's take on Modern Warfare franchise with "most true to life military game ever created with the majority of gameplay spent hauling equipment and filling out paperwork."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5tRNs2X5Q4

Haha - this reminds me of 50K Racewalker!

http://www.videlectrix.com/racewalk.html

I was going to say that the OP must not be a gamer...but judging from his Twitter bio, he probably does play video games at least a little, rather than just making a living making high-brow commentary about them: https://twitter.com/SimonParkin

I had this initial suspicion because I think virtually every serious gamer would have a different metric for "worst". I think we as a whole kind of appreciate games that are not fun by design: Cart Life and QWOP, for example. And, as a whole, I think we despise games that have been borked because of budget/developer problems (or, to look at it another way, cost cutting by the publisher) or are blatant ripoffs/sellouts.

(It's also possible, actually, very likely, that the headline was written by a New Yorker editor who has a non-gamer perspective on video games)

edit: Speaking of headlines, I noticed that the submission's title was originally modded to:

"Desert Bus: The Very Worst Video Game Ever Created"

...which is the actual OP headline (though not the meta title)... I omitted the 'Desert Bus' part when submitting the link...and now, currently, the headline is:

"Desert Bus: The Worst Video Game"

I guess a HN gaming mod also thinks the New Yorker is overstating its case :)

It's actually a quote from one of the comedians interviewed, which closes the article.

> Saunders agreed, mournfully: “It is, without a doubt, the very worst video game I have ever played.”

have you ever played desertbus? I think rather than debating whether it's the worst game ever most people would argue it's not a game at all. I recommend you try one of the ports if you haven't yet.

Exactly, a lot of "angry gamers" are debating here whether this is the "worst" game or not. This makes no sense, try the game and try to find some fun in it.

I had fun playing QWOP.

It by definition can't be the worst game because it does exactly what it was created to do.

I still think Bill Gates' DONKEY.BAS (described by him as "very thrilling") takes the prize as worst game ever.

It was Scorched Earth that you could play in school without getting in trouble. You're wrong!

I believe you're thinking of GORILLA.BAS.

Sorry, I should have said that it was a version of Scorched Earth that you could play in school.

Who wants to help me build this for the Oculus Rift?

That would be awesome if you do it!

This year will be my 5th Desert Bus for Hope.

I know it doesn't seem like much, but the running gags, the interaction via IRC, the challenges and the auctions really come together to produce the craziest week-and-a-bit of the year, every year. The link is http://desertbus.org, I urge everyone to have a look and save the date.

While you're there, I have to recommend LoadingReadyRun's other videos. They release a crazy amount of content every week, some for themselves and some for places like Escapist Magazine or Penny Arcade TV. Check out http://loadingreadyrun.com for links to all their videos.

A lot of 5 stars reviews that are easily laughable on their :

* android version : https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.tueidj.Des...

* iOs version : https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/desert-bus/id470288016?mt=8

but also a lot of angry people who think they got "scammed" by the ranks and reviews. I wonder if this really count as scams but at 0.99$ all I can do is laugh.

Do gamers brag about finishing this game?

"Very Worst"? Obviously someone has never played Superman 64...

How about Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing?

- Description talks about outrunning cops to deliver illegal goods, but there are no cops in the game

- AI opponents never move

- No collision detection

- Infinite speed in reverse gear

- Sometimes says you've won before you even left the start line

- The fifth (out of 5) map doesn't load and crashes the game

- A patch to fix the fifth map just turns it into the first map but mirrored (so I guess they couldn't work out how to fix it)

Weirdly somehow I think tens of thousands of copies of this were sold. I pity the people who wasted money on this.

When I read the title for this article, I thought it might be referring to some unconventional racing game that I remembered as getting the worst score ever on some gaming site. That game was Big Rigs. Thanks for reminding me of this hilarious atrocity.

http://www.gamespot.com/big-rigs-over-the-road-racing/review...

Looks the same guy was the producer for this game the more recent War Z [1]. Its also interesting that War Z also faced accusations around misleading customers [2] and [3].

[1] http://www.ign.com/articles/2013/01/08/the-war-z-review

[2] http://www.rockpapershotgun.com/2012/12/19/the-war-z-apologi...

[3] http://pc.gamespy.com/pc/the-war-z/1226980p1.html

Dragon's Lair for the original Gameboy (not for the GBC).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48U4Qd1io0I

Or Enviro-Bear 2000

Enviro-Bear 2000 is actually fun, though.

I'll see your Superman 64 and raise you Action 52.

I would mention an obscure game called 'Begin2' but I actually found it very enjoyable (once I figured out how to play it). :)

You have to work awful hard to beat Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing for sheer unmitigated badness -- a standard Desert Bus doesn't quite meet.

I think it is a fun game that was meant to get a message across. That being said, I will never spend more than a few minutes on it.

Wow. I guess this puts ET to shame.

Desert Bus is better than Crazy Bus: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hss2QwtT6xY

> eight hundred continuous hours of play

That is supposed to be eight, not eight-hundred. Someone should edit these before they are posted. It was stated as eight hours at the top, so there is little excuse to get this wrong.

The context is that the original game's publisher planned a prize for reaching 100 points, which would require 800 hours of gameplay. As this more than a month of continuous play, perhaps it is best this contest did not go live!

And every year around the holidays a comedy group called Loading Ready Run marathons playing the game for charity: http://desertbus.org/

That would be what much of the article is about, yes...

Compare Desert Bus (which does what it sets out to do) with Rise of the Robots which received considerable hype but was "quite disappointing".

Any word on whether the purchase of the iOS app goes, in any meaningful percentage, to the alleged charity?

I doubt it. Why would it? I think you may have misread the article. Do you expect every purchase of running shoes to fund charity, just because AidsWalks exist (to use the example from the article)?

Also, "alleged charity"? How big and established does a charity have to be before you don't refer to it as "alleged"?

It would because the article makes a big deal about using the game for charity purposes, and one specific iOS game can be expected to possibly route a percentage to that charity. I think you misread my post, confusing "this iOS app" with ALL iOS apps.

the android version donates all the proceeds to Childs Play through Desertbus for Hope. I can't remember hearing the same about the iOS version during last years event but I'd hope they did the same.

One of the best things I've seen in a while. Love it!

Desert Bus is precisely what it's advertised to be. It's the gaming equivalent of anti-humor, or something so audaciously contrary to expectations it derives value from its very audacity. It therefore succeeds in living up to Penn and Teller's goal. Also, again, they tell you exactly what you're in for before you begin, so nobody can claim to be surprised.

A truly bad game involves false advertisement, where the seller (publisher, developer, whoever) falsely claims to have a good game when, in point of fact, they have a festering piece of dung. "Pac Man" for the Atari 2600 is an example: It claimed to be a version of the arcade Pac Man, but it's a very bad copy at best, rushed out in an unfinished state to disappoint many, many people. "Big Rigs: Over The Road Racing" has already been mentioned; it shipped in an alpha state so broken the game is entirely unplayable. "Superman: The New Adventures" ("Superman 64") for the Nintendo 64 is less obviously broken, being at least competently implemented, but the design it's an implementation of is in no way an enjoyable game.

Anyway, those are a few examples of bad games. Any of them would have been a much better candidate to be the topic of this article.

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